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Just Say No!

The Dark Can’t Live in the Light

When it comes to relations with others it is the positive that is most enjoyed and of course the negative is not something you seek but sometimes what you fall into. No matter which of these that may occur in your life I believe that all relations can teach you something. In finding the lessons and/or wisdom you will end up gaining much more than you might initially think you’ve lost. I am well aware that toxic relations bring personal and emotional pain but through the havoc comes a greater desire for understanding and connection.

Negativity can be passed on through continued interaction and/or exposure to a negative and unhealthy energy, it’s a breed all on its own and these energy vampires can multiply over time. I don’t know that there is a fix-it solution or cure to rehabilitate negativity that has been conditioned over a long period of time but I wouldn’t say there is no chance because I think everyone has a shot at changing their life and behaviour around, it starts with the individual and what that personal choice in life is.

The dark can’t live in the light, negativity requires that others allow it, enable it, don’t question it but unfortunately that comes with a personal price. Your integrity, your soul, your sense of well-being is affected by your personal choices so it’s important not just for those you care about but for yourself to choose and follow your best life. Any or every time you make this compromise, even if it is for the sake of not ruffling any feathers, you are causing damage to your inner soul. When it comes to the times of processing your thoughts, sometimes at the end of the day or maybe in the silence, pay attention to how these choices affect your overall well-being, especially when you know deep down that you’ve made this kind of compromise?

what are you doing for others

Intention is everything and karma is the result and/or potential outcome of that intention. When you do something positive with the intention of creating good karma it won’t have that desired effect. When you do something positive with the intention of enriching the life of another without thought of karma, you are in effect at that moment creating good karma. Alternatively if you do something negative with the intention of hurting another you are also creating karma and it won’t be good. The wheel of karma is always spinning and your intention (good or bad) will always be connected to it.

The best actions are those inspired by good thoughts and the desire to elevate joy in the lives of others not for any other purpose but to bring happiness.

Sometimes in an effort to not be hurtful to another by being genuinely honest you end up extending your personal boundaries past your acceptable line, a line that will continue to recede until you stop it. Everyone’s boundaries matter and anyone who has respect for you and for themselves won’t attempt to push past those boundaries.

I can understand the emotions that motivate thoughts of revenge when something like this happens and as much as you might think you will enjoy it chances are you really won’t. Negativity’s only purpose is to consume, feed, destroy, control and contain your life lessons by derailing the positive. When you allow it, enable it or don’t question it you are willingly giving up your life lesson opportunities that are meant to help progress you to living your best life.

None of us are so great that we are above our life lessons, we are not above the challenges or the joys and when you try to prevent (enable) another from learning a hard life lesson, you aren’t doing that person or yourself any favors. You are preventing that person from experiencing life, we all have to feel everything, without it how would any of us develop genuine humanity.

If you have strong enough faith in the positive aspects and life force of the Universe you will find that they are working together to help you reach your goals. Things don’t happen instantaneously in any direction, everything is a process and takes time and as long as you can maintain enough patience to see yourself through then you can affect change.

be the change

 
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Posted by on August 16, 2015 in Blog

 

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It’s Not Who You Are, It’s the Behaviour!

De-programming your Patterns

Finding the root cause of any behaviour that you know in your soul isn’t right is the only way to change your patterns.  Awareness to the lack of the success you may have in an area of your life that you are unhappy in is the first step.  Recognizing and owning your flaws and behaviours is not easy or comfortable to do but you need to allow yourself to be vulnerable.  Vulnerability is not weakness, it is a form of courage and strength, like the calm before the storm that brings refreshing change.  Every time I have felt vulnerable or scared has been a moment of significant growth that has positively enhanced my life. Acknowledging that there is a familiar pattern and wanting to change that pattern is the key that unlocks the door to healing.

vulnerable

I think most of us are variations of either Self-Destruction or Self-Improvement, or both, and there are many factors that contribute to the level of how far we tip the scale.  What is your level of truth?

Do you find that you keep ending up in the same place at the end of any given situation even if you have the best intentions in mind?  When I started to recognize this in my own life I realized that I needed to do some work to figure out why these patterns kept showing up.  These patterns can create a cycle of disappointment within that can then evolve into self-destructive behaviour.

Bad behavior doesn’t mean bad person, it could mean conflicted, confused, reactive or could have developed as a result of a great trauma, hurt or betrayal.  When you continue down the path of self-destruction you risk becoming so numb that you fall of the edge that you’re already emotionally dangling on and that can lead to a variety of negative and/or tragic outcomes that don’t need to occur if you just honor your pain to heal.  Carrying it through your life on a daily basis will take a toll on your emotional, physical and mental health and ultimately be very harmful to your inner spirit.  You can end up restricting yourself from so many opportunities just because you can’t or won’t let go of emotions that are keeping you imprisoned within your mind by replaying the tapes that caused you pain.

behaviour

No one can see how you feel on the inside or what you’ve been through, could you imagine if all that was displayed on the outside of you?  There would be no way to hide anything and your vulnerability level would be out the roof.  There would be no way to deny what goes on inside and you would either have to put up with everyone knowing your truth or working it out.  It’s really important to do the work so that your inside can match your outside because until it does you will always feel conflicted, out of sync and struggling to find your way.  If something that wasn’t great propels you into the right direction, and that direction leads you something better than I believe that is the silver lining.  Everything happens for a reason!

We are not here to fulfill the dreams of others, we are here to share in theirs but fulfill our own dreams, find our own passion and our own place in this life.  That place will feel most in alignment with your inner spirit and feel as comfortable as home or whatever you consider “your happy place”.aha

It took me a long time to recognize my patterns but that awareness expanded my desire to delve deeper and I find new levels of insight and “aha” moments that tell me my work is not done and that’s good.  I don’t ever want those to end because that’s where the magic happens!

 
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Posted by on February 5, 2013 in Blog

 

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