Monthly Archives: November 2015

The Point of Impact!

Don’t Let an Emotional Hurt Define Your Life

Faith and reason sometimes aren’t enough to pull you out of the cage in your mind you’ve trapped yourself in from an emotional hurt even if you have the intellect of knowing better.  The worst thing you can do for yourself is to bottle it up and not let it go.  No matter how much you try to stuff it down, it’s going to continue to bubble back up to the surface until you dare to feel, process and let it go.  Finding the root, the point of impact that has stunted your own progress and growth in life is the only way to truly find your peace.I'm alright

Sometimes it’s easier to replace your hurt with anger because then you don’t have to feel the pain even though you probably still are.  Unfortunately that won’t diminish it or make it go away, it will continue to grow until you find the courage to face it head on.   When another person, whether it is friend, family or stranger causes you to feel bad about yourself it injures your confidence, self-esteem and self-worth.  Your personal connection to that person will be dependent upon how deeply it will affect you.

Friends aren’t your blood relatives but can feel just as close, sometimes closer and I don’t think it matters how much you value their opinion but rather how much of your heart, trust and loyalty you’ve placed in their hands.

Family are your past, your present and your future, how much you evolve and blossom is dependent upon the love and support they offer.  I’ve been lucky enough to have such strong love and support from family, even during the times when I was not receptive to it, you know like when you’re a teenager and think you know it all?

When your confidence, self-esteem or self-worth gets injured it changes you, it changes how you present yourself, how you connect and relate with others and how others perceive you.  What I believe is the worst part is that the change in you as a result of the emotional injury prevents others from getting to know you authentically because you end up withdrawing, building walls and distancing yourself as a way of blocking such an injury again.  New people in your life that could potentially become friends notice and feel that something is off which pops up as “red flags”, that something just isn’t right and depending on how interested or invested they are, they may just walk away.  Who loses here?  I would say both, chances are you aren’t happy if you’re not being your authentic self and that person doesn’t get to know the “real you”.

Unfortunately an emotional hurt can run deep and when not dealt with you may start projecting negativity towards others as a way of offsetting the hurt, which turns everyone away and if you hang onto it for too long it will start to manifest as more serious warnings in your health.  Negativity is like a virus and at first it will be symptoms that doctors can’t find answers to because the only prescription for health is within you, you must face and embrace the pain.

I believe we are all seeking the same in life; love, acceptance, connection and compassionate familiarity.  I base how I treat others on how I want to be treated and while everyone may not behave or react in that same way, it’s not a reflection of how they feel about me but rather how they feel about themselves.  While that may not make things easier to take I think with time it makes things easier to understand.

Being present to the feelings of others enhances and strengthens your connection with them, it allows them to feel safe to be authentic and vulnerable.  When you embark upon this kind of connection with someone, know that you’re in the presence of a kindred spirit.

important encounters


Posted by on November 30, 2015 in Blog


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Change is a Gift

Let it Be

Change is inevitable, how you view change is ultimately going to define your state of being, happiness and outlook on life.  Not every change is welcome but every change is necessary because without it you won’t progress or have the opportunity to evolve your level of consciousness.  It is through change that you become more defined or shall I say more refined but you will end up becoming more connected to your world and those in it which is definitely a gift.

I don’t know if there is some cosmic shift going on or not right now, I know the astrology forecasts are always talking about specific shifts but I feel that some kind of change is in the air even though I can’t quite figure out exactly what it is, it feels positive though and hopeful and I sense it will be fulfilling.

The shift itself feels similar to how you feel when you are coming out on the end of some sort of emotional process that you had to work through like that of failure, disappointment or heartbreak because these kinds of experiences change you in ways you wouldn’t have expected, they seem to cause a deep stir in the make-up of who you are.

How do you make it through the transition of tough and emotional experiences like failure, disappointment or heartbreak; are you letting these experiences define you or are you defying the odds you feel are against you to overcome them?  Probably the most soul-crushing experiences because they ultimately alter who you were and from there who you are to become and while the words “growth period” is usually what is used to describe these kinds of experiences it doesn’t ease the challenges or hurt any get to choose

Finding the light at the end of that “oh so long” tunnel sometimes seems non-existent and that is because you are so enmeshed in the grief period that the other side is unseen and unimaginable.  Growth periods take time, patience and your personal understanding in realizing that there isn’t anything wrong with you even though you may feel broken.  Jane Fonda described this particular experience as “not being broken but rather broken open” which I think is the best description because when you are broken open you are fully exposed, fully vulnerable and fully open because there is nothing left to damage and nothing left to give.

This is the key moment to change that is now to become a part of your path, because you have been stripped bare and are open there is no resistance left, there is now room for new and positive experiences to enter your life.  I think how you view each of these experiences is ultimately going to be your guiding force to get you back into your life and feel positive and hopeful about your future.

Sometimes the presence of emotions over failure, disappointment or heartbreak is not existent during a major time of transition but I think the process in getting through it is similar in that you aren’t really sure of what you are doing or where you are going but the need for some kind of change feels imminent.  Balancing a sense of peace and patience (knowing that things will work out in a positive way) when things feel a little scattered or misdirected will be what grounds you.

Failure:  I’ve always been hard on myself and viewed my own personal failure as a huge sign of defeat but in the last 5-10 years I’ve taken on a different view.  I no longer believe it to be failure, instead I’ve come to the understanding that the word failure is the word I had interjected into my experiences because my faith that “everything happens for a reason” and “all things happen as they are meant to” conflict, my faith and failure cannot logically co-exist.  If all things happen as they are meant to then how could it possibly be failure, it would have to be an intended outcome, which I do believe it is.  It is the ego that constantly tries to override the soul and the emotions that our soul relates to us are our signals that the ego is trying to gain control.

Disappointment & Heartbreak:  I think these two are the more heartfelt emotions because they are usually connected to your hopes and dreams.  Everyone gets caught up at one time or another in the fairy tale idealism and why not, there’s a wisp of it in almost everything within our view through magazine, television, books, etc.  I think problems start to arise when the ego tries to control who and what is going on, and of course to make people, places and things that are currently in your life fit into your soul’s hopes and dreams.  As a result disappointment and heartbreak happen because this is not something that is guided by the ego but rather felt by the soul, you can’t rush or fit it.

I really believe that “everything happens for a reason”, I really believe that “all things happen as they are meant to” and I really believe that when the time is right all of that falls into place and not a moment too soon.

Without gratitude for where you are now how could you ever get any further without struggle or resistance while trying to rush the future?  It’s all about allowing your soul to speak, enjoying the moments in between and appreciating what you have in the now.

the experience of gratitude


Posted by on November 2, 2015 in Blog


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