A Necessary Form of Healing
There comes a time when you need to clean out the areas of your brain where the stuck tape keeps playing, the tape that keeps you in a perpetual cycle that is out of sync with the Law of Attraction. As of late my life has been extremely busy and demanding which has caused me to deplete my own levels of tolerance and patience. When those two areas of my life run low it reduces my ability to fend off the negativity virus.
The negativity virus comes in many forms, not just thoughts but also actions which cause reactions and consequences and even though I know I’ve pushed the boundaries at times, I’ve learned that honest communication and sincere humility can be the positive aspect in changing the direction of that outcome.
I find that when I get in those funks it heightens my desire to “help others see the light”, which in hindsight becomes ridiculous. I have no right to do that and even though I’ve learned to recognize when those areas are depleted there are times when I don’t catch it quickly enough and that causes me even more inner frustration and that frustration only perpetuates the virus. I’ve just now realized that I’ve depleted myself and recognized that I’m at the beginning of that path and it’s time to stop!
I call it a negativity virus because it feels like a virus, like the flu it makes you feel like you aren’t yourself, cranky and out of sorts and your immune system is lowered which is the opening negativity needs to get in.
Unfortunately I have really high expectations for myself and falling onto that path, no matter what the reason, just won’t do. It’s not so much that I feel I’ve failed, I don’t view things as failures but rather opportunities to make adjustments to my liking. My attitude is very much determined and focused, I know where I want to go and usually I want to get there now! Needless to say patience and tolerance weren’t my strongest suits when I was younger and over the years I’ve learned to develop them but they are usually the first things to go when the tank starts to run on empty.
I think we all have our moments of weakness and how we handle them or rather correct them is what defines us. The most important thing that I’ve always been conscious of is to “think before I speak”, some things can’t be unsaid and they are usually the most damaging ones that you want to take back. Now at the same time I do believe that honesty and sincerity are absolutely essential if you are trying to rectify that kind of accidental communication.
I won’t say I’ve never said something I’ve regretted and at the time I’m quite sure I had the momentary satisfaction of blurting something out but the key word is momentary. The period of regret for that moment was much longer and the best teacher for learning to “think before I speak”.
So how do I reinstate my levels of tolerance and patience?
Awareness and recognition is the first step, honest reflection is the second step and whatever process it takes for me to recharge my batteries is the third step.
I find that once I’ve become aware and recognized I’m depleted it propels me into the honest reflection stage and rejuvenation usually falls into place shortly after. The way to deal is different for everyone, whatever works for you to make you feel better is what you should do, especially if you just aren’t feeling like yourself. If it means you take a “time out” for yourself than that’s what you should do because it’s not fair to you or anyone in your life to deplete yourself.
So for me, I’ll be writing because that is my best outlet for recharging myself and getting my levels of tolerance and patience back where they should be. I definitely don’t like feeling out of sorts, it doesn’t fit right or feel good and if I’m not operating on the right side of the Law of Attraction then I’m depriving myself of the gifts that accompany positive experiences.
Shelley Hallmark 