Tag Archives: handling life’s challenges

Bring It On!

Facing the Challenge

Challenges not only define our character but they build it as well.

Who are you really?  Are you someone that pushes the limits to achieve because you feel so strongly that it is your destined path?  Or do you say to yourself “I’m not sure, I’ll sit back and wait” and then never try because it’s easier?

I am someone who pushes the limits, I like a challenge, I think for me that comes from being an athlete in competitive team sports.  I don’t get as much athletic sport in as I used to, responsibilities are more in demand but competition has always been very inspiring and motivating for me.  Chances are if you’ve ever taken part in any team sport “sitting back and waiting” isn’t a desired skill of any team player, you have to get in there and dig a little.

Although being a team player doesn’t necessarily mean that “pushing the limits” is carried out in your daily life as well, you may feel you’re not as confident alone as you are with the team.  It all depends on you personally, what your goals and intentions are and how strongly you feel about what you want out of this life.


Recently I had to adapt to a difficult and challenging experience and I have to admit that while in the midst of it I did not feel very strong but now through it and out on the other side I’ve found that it has expanded my awareness and opened my beliefs to a higher level of appreciation.  Every life experience, no matter the level of difficulty, is there to teach us something.  We all go through experiences that ultimately are there to make us a better person and we have two choices.  We can either recognize, learn and grow from them or we can ignore them and wallow in our dislike of the experiences.

Obviously the more challenging the experience the greater the demand is for inner strength to endure it and depending on the circumstances and how much support you have around you, it can affect how well you cope.  Sometimes being alone can put you in the company of your worst enemy.

I’ve had conversations with others who have evoked the same emotion at that moment that they felt at the time when recalling something that made them sad.  It’s amazing how the heart can hold onto an emotion for what seems like an eternity even well after a challenging transition has concluded.  I think sometimes it can feel surprising that our emotion just sits there below the surface, dormant until something triggers it.

I feel that this recent experience was meant to break me open yet again to propel me onto a new path and eventually when I do take a glance back to see how far I’ve come I will be surprised, monumental change is ahead and it’s all positive!

My faith was challenged, as was my inner strength but now I say “Bring it On!”, I have the determination to not let my challenges or tests break or weaken me, I know they are meant to make me stronger.  It all starts with taking that “leap of faith”; a real “leap of faith” means believing in something so fiercely that there is no possibility for any other outcome other than that which you believe in.  That belief cannot be deterred by circumstance, delay or setbacks; it is ignited by signs and omens that insinuate and fan the flames of our imagination and intuition of that which we see in our mind’s eye and will come to be.

Remember, it’s not about what you take with you, it’s about what you build and authenticity is the most important character trait you can possess.  Genuine, heartfelt emotional connections to others are the bread of life and it’s through those connections that we find who we are meant to be, what we are meant to do and where we are meant to go and ultimately who will be with us.

Those kindred spirits are the ones we are meant to connect with, the ones we travel through this life with and the ones we can’t do without.  Build that life and only happiness can follow.

best things must be felt


Posted by on October 1, 2013 in Blog


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Trying to Find my Balance Again!

During a Time that Feels Wildly Unbalanced

The spectrum of emotions that has plagued my mind for the last month and a half has definitely taken its toll by making me feel completely unbalanced and out of sync.

As I wrote about in one of my recent posts “Very Challenging Time”, A my daughter’s Scoliosis journey presented detours that I hadn’t expected.  Almost a month after her surgery she was finally released from the hospital and I felt positive about the road to recovery from there but what I hadn’t foreseen was that we would be back at the hospital 4 days later because one of the infections she had (unrelated to the surgery) had come raging back with a vengeance.

The time period that evolved when the doctors were trying to determine the source of her sickness was terrifying, to say the least, they covered everything and I mean everything!  As a parent it is difficult to have to sit back and watch them work especially if your child is stressed by it, as I had said my daughter recently had Scoliosis surgery with rods and screws fused to her spine and only a month ago.  I realize that they have to determine the source of her sickness but I have to admit it was extremely difficult to watch them push up and down her spine to see if she flinched anywhere.  I’m thinking “of course it bothers and hurts her some, what would anyone expect after only a month given the significance of the surgery”, I kept asking them to call someone from that team of specialists because they all knew her case intimately but until they had determined that was the cause that wasn’t going to happen.  As I said I realize they weren’t trying to hurt her and wanted to make sure they checked every avenue so they could get her the appropriate treatment but it was really difficult to watch and as I write this it makes me feel like I’m making this all about me but as a parent, their pain and discomfort feels 100 times yours.  You could throw anything in my path and I can handle it but it’s amazing how anything to do with our children can bring us to our knees and provoke such a feeling of helplessness.confined by walls you build yourself

After 48 hours of constant testing, poking, prodding and only 1 ½ hours sleep for my daughter it was finally determined that one of previous infections had not been fully eliminated so course of treatment followed and after a few days she started to respond and get back to being herself and after another 8 days in the hospital she has been released again.

I’m trying to find my balance again but it’s difficult because I feel like the threat of this re-occurring is looming around me and I am hesitant to allow myself into the space of feeling confident that things are going to be Ok.  The slightest instance of any symptom for pretty much anything out there keeps terrorizing my mind and I know that this is only possible because I am basically “running on empty”.  As much as the first round scared me, the second round has completely drained me and severely challenged my inner strength and faith.  I know it will come back but it may take me some time to trust it.  I also know I’m lucky and blessed that her prognosis is positive but my mind won’t allow me to fully embrace that yet.

There are many parents out there with children that are sick and the source is unknown or the source is known and the outcome is not positive and I can’t even imagine what life must be like for them or how they manage to deal with it daily.  I can only offer my sincerest compassion for the roller coaster ride I’m sure they are constantly on, as with everything (including health challenges) there are ups and down, good days and bad days.  I can only hope and pray for those that are currently in the midst of these kinds of challenges that the good days fill their hearts with enough love to carry them through the bad ones.

As I always say “Everything happens for a reason” and one of my beliefs is that we don’t go through difficult challenges for no reason.  There is a purpose, and I’ve always believed that we are put through difficulty to make us stronger for something that is to come in our future.  Even though I know my difficulty at this time isn’t as difficult as others it makes me wonder what is ahead that requires me to develop as much strength as it’s taking me to get through this.

I have, am and always will be about “all things positive” and I know I will get back there but this dip at this time has set me back more than I could have ever imagined or predicted.  The positive aspect of this experience is that it has increased my understanding, empathy and admiration for those that power through these difficult experiences with great integrity and strength of character.

strong person

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Posted by on September 24, 2013 in Blog


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I Wasn’t Mad at You!

I Was Mad at the Situation!

Have you ever said this to someone?  Did it have the outcome you expected?


Has someone ever said this to you?  How did it make you feel?

I’ve had this experience on the receiving end because honestly I could never say this to someone and actually think that it was ok.  The conclusion I’ve come to is that when someone says this it is because they are feeling helpless, inadequate or fearful and it seems to be a situationally based and reactive behaviour.  I believe that everyone’s feelings count but not when those feelings are used in a combative or hurtful way.

In a way this statement is an eye opener for you as to who the person really is and it reveals a lot about how they will handle any level of stress, especially if they are projecting their stress toward someone else.  It’s also a good indication of what you can expect to see in the future, similar to the theory “to see how someone deals with something give them a string of tangled christmas lights”, honestly that seems like a good theory.

We all have different levels of adversity to deal with in our lives, no one’s is more important the other’s, but if we all ran around biting each other’s heads off because we were mad about our challenges how would we ever learn to cope or gain wisdom while maintaining a level of integrity.

the problem


Even though I’ve heard many times that “people don’t change” or “leopards don’t change their spots” I believe that anyone can change their behaviourial lifestyle for the better, especially if it is currently working poorly for them, but the key is that they have to want to.  It’s hard work to make changes to behaviour, they are ingrained, they’ve developed from our early years and even though habits are very hard to break, they can be broken but in order to do that determination and willingness to meet that goal will be the biggest challenge.  My experience has led me to believe that anyone that makes this statement isn’t likely to change, not because they can’t but because they won’t.  They either don’t realize the effect they actually have on someone or they don’t take well to the response of hurt feelings and become defensive.

Any challenge that is difficult requires a strong and determined resolve to be successful and I’ve found that any time I attempt to do something I put my mind to there is no way I am going to allow myself to give up.  Any inkling that creeps into my mind telling me I can’t do something is not allowed to stay and that is my resolve and it works well for me.  Everyone is different though, just because my thought process works for me, doesn’t mean it will work for someone else and maybe each of us need to find some sort of adaptation that works to be successful.

It’s a big commitment to make a change like this, everyone has the ability and the opportunity but not everyone has the endurance to see it through to the end.  When you are going through something that is extremely challenging it’s a benefit to have some sort of validation from others that you are going to be successful but it’s not their validation that is the most important, it’s your own.  When you don’t get that validation it can become the reason to give up because it’s just too hard and no one’s patting you on the back yet anyway but that’s the test, the life lesson.

Life is full of challenges and how you deal, cope and adapt to those challenges is entirely your decision but I think it’s important to recognize and be aware of how those decisions may be affecting those around you that you care for.

good-bad life

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Posted by on July 10, 2013 in Blog


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