Tag Archives: living your best life

Raising the Bar

Living through your Lessons with Joy

Your lessons shape you:

You are a product of the environment that you grow through, all your lessons build and shape who you are to become so they are definitely essential.  Even the more difficult experiences carry with them important elements of a plan that has not yet come to fruition.  No one knows their life plan and what things will look like ten, twenty or thirty years down the road.  Sure you may have ideas of what you want to see but how things actually turn out is really dependent upon how you play the hand you are dealt, how you process it internally and externally.

Your experiences and lessons are meant to challenge you to rise to the occasion and I guess the internal question to ponder is how are you doing with that?  Are you allowing the experiences to define you or are you daring to rise up stronger?  I can say with certainty that the lessons are not meant to tear you down to oblivion but instead to dismantle the elements you may have taken on that do no serve your spirit well, the elements you need to let go of or transform.  Not everything we carry with us emotionally is meant to continue past the experience except to be a point of reference (a signpost) for developing awareness.

My lessons have been challenging but not so challenging that I couldn’t recover or find a new path and that’s not because they weren’t very difficult but rather because I refuse to let any difficulty break me.  For sure they take time to go through and not every part of an experience is easy to step back from and be objective about but you need to be kind to yourself when you stumble.  It’s easy to chastise yourself for allowing something to go farther than it should have when you believe you should have known better and the inner dialogue that results can only damage your self-worth and self-esteem.  So the next time you are in the midst of a dilemma allow yourself a moment to step outside of that struggle, look at the experience as if you were providing an analysis or solution for a friend.  If it wasn’t your experience what would you advise a friend to do?  In that moment when you’ve stepped outside of it you’ve allowed yourself a little more objectivity and that can be very empowering in to finding resolution and/or a way to manage through to the end of the experience.

Fake it until you make it:

As difficult as some lessons feel keep telling yourself that you are loving them for the wisdom you know you are going to gain, embrace them even when they aren’t even remotely satisfying because without them you don’t get through to an ending, a closure.  Every experience can have a positive side effect come out of it you just have to want to find it.  It could be renewed strength, personal empowerment or an elevation of gratitude, many effects really.  What you are looking for to define the experience (positive or negative) is exactly what you will continue to find every time you relive it.  Your thoughts and how you perceive your experiences are entirely up to you, you can either lessen the damage or increase it, this is determined by the perspective you are encouraging.

When you talk about an experience you have the opportunity through your thoughts and words whether or not to let that experience be one that broke you or one that made you stronger, it’s your choice!  I say fake it until you make it, maybe at the beginning of that conversation it feels like it broke you but what you can relate to others is that it didn’t break you but made you stronger.  After a while of continuing to repeat those thoughts and words you begin to change the fabric of that story, you inevitably become stronger and while at the beginning you may have been faking it you are now making it true.

Stay present:

Not everything that happens to you occurs because of who you are, try not to take things too personally, I know at times that can be difficult but most often when you experience conflict it isn’t in direct relation to your lessons but maybe another’s, you may just be a part of their experience that is designed to awaken them.

It is a normal response to look for ways to escape the more difficult aspects in life, no one longs for difficulty or struggle but keep in mind it is a lot more taxing on the stress in your mind to resist the natural flow than to allow it.  As easy as letting go sounds in theory, it can be extremely difficult to actually begin that process, it starts with acceptance and brings immediate relief.  I think everyone at one time or another struggles with letting go, when I had the experience I hadn’t realized at that point how much effort it was taking from me to hold onto the resistance and how much relief I felt when I finally let things be.

Life’s ups and downs occur so you can develop boundaries, balance, happiness, clarity and direction.

Sometimes the necessity to find a way out when feeling overwhelmed can be the beginning of a new opportunity so it is important to stay present, eyes wide open.

It is important to me to learn from my past and look forward toward the future with hope while maintaining a strong presence in the now.

Connecting with others on a soul level is the most beautiful part of presence, don’t miss out pursue it passionately!

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Posted by on February 23, 2018 in Blog


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Lighten Up!

And Let the Love Flow

Are you struggling in any or all areas of your life?  Does it feel like something is holding you back from the changes you want to see occur?  It all starts with your thoughts, specifically your dominant ones, which thoughts are you encouraging, embellishing and embracing?  Are you letting the experiences in your life that have hurt you define and shape the story and direction of your life?  The time to change is now and it begins with letting go of that which no longer serves you.

Ease up, relax and settle back into your authentic self, dig deep down if you have to but get in touch with who you are at your soul level.  If you are feeling the grips of struggle it is likely that part of you hasn’t had a voice for a while and you would be doing yourself a great kindness by re-connecting.

Your answers, where you want to go and what you want to see change are found within the silence.  If you have long forgotten what you wanted in life or aren’t sure anymore then you really need to pay attention to those whisperings, they come from your heart and your soul and they won’t lead you in the wrong direction.

To see the manifestation of your dreams and all you desire you must set your intention and then blend with the energetic flow of least resistance.  It is actually easier to do than you may think, it’s as easy as breathing.  The only reason letting go seems to be so difficult is because you have become too accustomed to going against the stream instead of allowing it to carry you.

Have you ever noticed how relaxed, happy and zen anyone who has seen their dreams and desires manifest are?  Of course they would be happy because they are finally “living their dream” but it’s also because stepping into that state began with letting go, having faith and trusting in the divine to lead you to your true destiny, whatever that may be.  There is much comfort and ease in that state of being, more than you may realize and definitely more than anyone trying to discourage you will acknowledge.

When you feel like you are constantly in the challenges of life you are not relaxed, happy or zen, you are stressed.  Has the amount of stress you put on yourself in any given situation every positively changed the outcome?  I would bet no, simply because I have done this to myself, more than once actually, and every time it’s been a total waste of energy that I could have put to better positive use.

I’ve noticed that the times when I’ve felt relaxed, happy and zen that my life flows with much more ease and in hindsight I find myself recognizing the patterned dysfunction of it all and wondering why when I know I am doing this to myself do I continue to embrace it?  Simple, it’s a conditioning that needs to be broken, changed, re-aligned and re-formatted into a positively charged pattern, this takes discipline and time so don’t get discouraged.

From the time we are young we are conditioned to be fearful, something for sure is going to catch up with you and ruin your “not likely to achieve” dreams.  We are told to be realistic and not to expect too much, the world doesn’t just give you all the breaks.  Ok, for a small part of that I will agree and I will tell you why.  It is true you aren’t going to get all the breaks at least not for free, you are actually going to have to do the work.  Anything worth having is worth working for, you can’t just ask for abundance and then do nothing to work toward it but as long as you put your intention out there, believe in it, feel it, blend it with that energy and then do your work the opportunity for those breaks begin to open up.

When you do the work you will find your confidence, self-worth and personal empowerment begin to grow and after a while the work doesn’t seem as hard now as it was at the beginning and that is because the first step of this journey is letting go.

Changing that thought so that you are no longer holding onto the fear is the most difficult and monumental part of positive change but it can be done!

  • What do you want to see manifest in your life?
  • What are you willing to do to make it happen?

Get out there now, the sky is your limit!


Posted by on February 16, 2018 in Blog


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Dream Big, Dare Greatly!

It’s Never Too Late for Action

If it is something you have dreamed about, you need to act, if it is all that you’ve ever wanted, you need to act, if it is within your grasp, you need to act!

There is more self-loathing contained in the one that never takes the chance, whether you are held back by fear or not, taking a chance at your dreams takes courage and when you feed that courage you gain strength and confidence in yourself.

I never would have ventured the thought that within vulnerability lies your biggest source of strength but it is and challenging yourself when you feel the most exposed and vulnerable is like recharging your stamina meter, look out world I’m on a mission!

You may think that being vulnerable is being weak but it is actually being strong, strong enough to show your own vulnerability. When you do this, I’m not going to lie, it can be really scary but what you gain is inner strength, there is no greater exposure to who you really are, no one could expose you any further because you’ve already opened up your vulnerable

You can’t get to courage without walking through vulnerability…

Vulnerability is the birthplace of everything we are hungry for…

Both of these statements were quoted by Dr. Brene Brown and I definitely agree with them, I experienced this exact epiphany (although couldn’t articulate as beautifully) but these words are true and you won’t be able to really understand how profound it really is until you step into your own space of vulnerability.

What you think about yourself is more important than you may realize, how you view your importance and place in this life is what feeds your self-pride and/or your courage to take a chance and go for what you want.

The quote below is now added to my collection of favorite quotes for a few reasons, I have observed a variety of different personalities, some I gravitate to and some I gravitate away from.

Theodore Roosevelt quote that Dr. Brene Brown references at the beginning of her latest book “Daring Greatly”:

It’s not the critic who counts, it’s not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles or where the doer of deeds could have done them better, the credit goes to the man who’s actually in the arena, whose face is marred with dust and sweat and blood, who strives valiantly and who errs and fails and is sometimes victorious but when he fails as least he does so daring greatly!

There is always going to be those that stand at the sidelines too afraid to try and full of self-loathing because of it and what they point out as your faults are really how they feel about themselves, they likely have more respect for you because you tried and are mad at themselves and jealous because they lacked the courage to dare greatly.

It doesn’t make them any less of a person, I think it’s just because somewhere along the line their courage and faith got broken, your self-talk is so important because you can either make or break yourself further with your own thoughts but realize it doesn’t mean that’s it and you’re over!

It’s never too late for action to change everything around you, it starts with your thoughts and that’s not going to cost you a thing, except some faith. Every day or every week you can change one thought about yourself from negative to positive, thoughts become attitude and then outlook and before you know it the world around you starts to change and mold according to those new positive thoughts.

Change your thoughts, change your life….. Wayne Dyer

Don’t you believe you are worth it?

  • I do! I believe we are all worth it, all deserving of the living the life we want, all you have to do is take action, be positive and don’t give up! Why would you expect that your best life is to come to you and not the other way around? Anything worth having, is worth doing the work for!

We are only victims of the prisons we put ourselves in with our thoughts so change your thoughts!

Don’t let your self-talk ruin you, you’re better than that and deserve better than that and you can have anything you want as long as you’re willing to do the work, make the sacrifices and never take no for an answer!

Dream Big, Dare Greatly and do it with Integrity!

dare to dream

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Posted by on April 20, 2015 in Blog


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