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Have A Word With Yourself!

You Can’t Change What You Don’t Acknowledge

Do you find, at times, that you jump to the wrong conclusions causing an inappropriate reaction before letting a conversation finish?

Do you find that those reactions are consistently having a negative effect on your relationships and communications with others?

Do you often believe that you are right without considering the possibility that there may be more for you to learn?

When you close your mind from empathizing, understanding, considering and/or acknowledging other points of view then you cut yourself off from your own evolution of personal growth.  Not only does this prevent you from developing your soul but it stagnates your relations with others as they continue to grow and evolve with others that share their interests.

We all want to connect, we all want to be heard and we all want to be acknowledged.

When you disregard another person’s feelings you are rejecting their right to have a voice, you are suppressing their concerns and most importantly you are negating their pain.

when-a-person-says-you-hurt-them

Respect, appreciation and gratitude are the foundation for every aspect of life;

Respect is not only those around you (like the waiter, the clerk at the store or someone down on their luck) but the items you use in your daily life, everything is energy!

If you were to abuse your vehicle, an appliance or your home eventually they would begin to deteriorate.  Nature and our environment thrive on the generosity of our respect, for it is all living energy that requires nurturing and without that becomes listless and dies, some damage irreversible.

Appreciation for every experience, lesson and opportunity can provide you with a renewed sense of insight.  Not just the good but sometimes even the worst experiences lead us onto a better path and usually with a stronger of self and clarity.  It may be that your purpose is connected to one of those experiences.

Lessons are also an essential part of life, not everything can be gained from the knowledge contained in books, first-hand experience is the best teacher you will ever have, sometimes not the most favorable but usually the most effective.  All opportunities are gifts, ones that shouldn’t be refused because they look like work or aren’t as appealing to the eye as you’d like.

Gratitude (noun):  the quality of being thankful; readiness to show appreciation for and to return kindness.

Is gratitude something you do occasionally or how you live?  Is your gratitude based only on what you receive from others or are you grateful for their mere presence in your life?  Do you only at times offer the words to express that gratitude or is it something you believe is just known by those around you?

Active gratitude is an empowering and happy energy to embrace and practice daily, one that will fuel and nurture your soul and the souls of those around you.+

Without gratitude you lose the whole purpose of your journey, without respect you lose yourself.

You can’t change what you don’t acknowledge!

prime-purpose-is-to-not-hurt-others

 
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Posted by on January 25, 2017 in Blog

 

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Forgive & Appreciate Your Way Back to Happiness!

Letting Go for Your Own Freedom

Don’t tell me how many battles you’ve won, tell me how many people you’ve forgiven!

I’m not sure who wrote this quote but I read it recently and it resonated with me immediately. My first thought was “Yes, that’s it exactly!” and the next thought was to wonder how many people are afflicted daily by the emotional prison that they trap themselves in as a result of not being able to embrace forgiveness.

Of course this isn’t to say that your emotional hurt is invalid but rather that it’s not necessary or fair to your inner spirit to carry it around with you like the badge of horror it can be. When you are unable to cross the line into forgiveness it doesn’t affect anyone as much as it does you. I think many people have a variety of reasons for holding on to a painful memory and while I’m sure the reason is valid it doesn’t mean it’s not having a negative effect on your life. It doesn’t mean the person you hold it against is being impacted in any way whatsoever and it doesn’t mean that by holding onto it that eventually retribution will come.

Forgive: stop feeling angry or resentful toward (someone) for an offense, flaw or mistake 

Easier said than done, believe me I know! When someone hurts you deeply it’s not just the emotional pain of the hurt but the emotional attachment you have to the person that has hurt you.

People you don’t have any attachment to can’t hurt you so much because they lack that personal connection. Those closest to you know where your soft spots of vulnerability are and you know theirs but it is because of a mutual trust that neither of you intentionally try to use them against each other. It is when trust is broken that hurt happens and that hurt can carry you into the mode of defense which raises your guard. The only thing that lowers that guard is honest and open communication and the willingness for resolve but sometimes that’s not an available option. So what do you do with all these feelings of hurt when there is no option for closure on the horizon?

I’m sure everyone (including myself) has asked these questions “how could you do this to me?”, and “why don’t you care?”, “how can you just go on in your life like nothing about this mattered?” Most often there is some sort of falling out or ending and if it’s the latter then I don’t think it’s likely you’re going to find the answers you would like for closure and without closure how do you let go and move on?

dirty feet

I’ve found that distance from a difficult experience, a break or mental vacation from it can be a temporary enough solution to help you put some space between your hurt and your emotions so you can find the positives from it, there are always positives, you just have to want to see them. Sometimes it may be a while until you see the wisdom behind the experience but eventually that “aha” moment peaks when you least expect it but when most open to it.

If you aren’t able to have that space to heal I believe it just means that your healing will take a little longer. Dedication, understanding and compassion toward yourself for the extra time it may take is the kindness you need to extend to yourself until you get there.

Appreciate: recognize the full worth of, understand (a situation) fully, recognize the full implications of

Being able to step outside of an experience long enough to gain clarity is the best path to understanding the “true lesson” behind the experience.Appreciation even in the face of difficulty will build inner strength and character, it has to right? I mean what else could come from hurt, disappointment and mental anguish except to get back up, dust yourself off and become the stronger person you were meant to be? It’s been said that when you don’t learn from an experience it keeps coming back around until you do, so if you have to go through it then best to only have to go through it once. Step back and really examine so you can find what it is that you are to take with you and learn. Why put yourself through it more than you have to, your experiences are not meant to break you, they are meant to build you.

As hard as it is to foresee the road ahead it is only through having appreciation for all experiences (positive or negative) that you will begin to cultivate happiness. Start with the smaller successes and after a while you will see that those successes will multiply and begin to shape a brighter, happier and more positive future.

Happiness: the state of being happy

It doesn’t get any clearer than that and where are you at with your own happiness? Happiness isn’t just for other people who seem like they have it all together. Happiness is a state of being, a state that you can access at any time, a state that doesn’t discriminate or align with only the lucky ones.

If another has done you wrong, mistreated you, taken you for granted or overreacted badly, that is not on you, it is on them which doesn’t mean you are now excluded from the state of happiness. Your own happiness depends on how you turn things around, how you want to view the world and what kind of life you decide to live.just be happy

It’s your choice but I’d suggest to “Choose Happiness”.

 
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Posted by on June 24, 2015 in Blog

 

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Happy Thanksgiving Canada!

A Day of Gratitude

Although the day of Thanksgiving is different in Canada than in the United States, the meaning is the same, it’s the day of thanks for all we appreciate and have gratitude for.

It’s important to have gratitude in your life, not just on Thanksgiving but as a daily ritual. I think too many times at the end of the day we find ourselves focusing on the things that didn’t go right instead of the things that did and it’s the thoughts that you feed the most that are going to grow.

If I am going to increase any specific state of being gratitude is the best place to start, it positively enhances all aspects of your life and builds an inner strength of character that is unmatched and unaffected by negativity.

gratitude, parent

Gratitude, appreciation and thanks for all that your life has brought to you so far will increase growth in the direction you seek. Your path will have many opportunities, obstacles and lessons along the way and understanding that they are all a part of your personal journey will help you to embrace the wisdom that gratitude ushers in.

Gratitude isn’t just a “means to an end”, it is a way of life that opens up so many other doors, ones you couldn’t imagine or know were there because it’s not just about giving thanks, it is a conscious shift into this state of being that is transitioned not just through forgiveness but awareness, vulnerability and acceptance as well and with it comes a state of happiness that you cannot buy, manipulate or manufacture.

There are many different ways to transition yourself into a daily gratitude ritual and it’s just a matter of finding the one that fits best for you. Possibilities I’ve heard of are starting a gratitude journal that you make entries into on either a daily, weekly or monthly basis. It’s a matter of being able to find that time to focus and make it an important part of your life because once you do those are the thoughts you are feeding and as a result they will grow.

The more you have gratitude for the more you will see the results of that gratitude manifest in your life. If you aren’t one that finds it easy to write your thoughts down, you could take a period of time in your day where you use your thoughts internally, like some of do at the end of the night before falling asleep. Honestly I think it would be better to replay thoughts of gratitude before falling asleep instead of occurrences of the day as it is a more positive place to have your subconscious drift into while you sleep and can then permeate those thoughts into flourishing throughout the following day.

It takes discipline at the beginning to maintain whichever gratitude process you create but as soon as it starts to become personal habit it will then be effortless and you will see your life change in all the ways you had hoped for.

happy thanksgiving

 
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Posted by on October 13, 2014 in Blog

 

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What You Can Become!

Closing the Gaps

It’s not how long you live, it’s what you do with the time you are here! If you want or expect positive experiences and blessings to occur you must make room for them to manifest and exist in your life. Pursue them with everything you’ve got and rest only when you are satisfied!successful mindset

Quote by Leonardo da Vinci:

“It has long since come to my attention that people of accomplishment rarely sat back and let things happen to them. They went out and happened to things.”

It starts with you!

  • Do you really want what you desire?
  • Or do you believe that it should come to you?

These are the defining questions that determine the ultimate direction of your life and your desired goals.

Positively speaking; if you really want what you desire you will go after it without any thought other than success. You must believe in yourself and your goal wholeheartedly and when your belief is this strong there is no room for anything other than success. Everything I have put my heart, mind and soul into has been successful and not for any other reason than that I left no room for any other result. Your belief can actually produce the result and if this sounds crazy to you then put it to the test, I dare you!

Keep in mind that the belief must be felt within every fibre of your being, you cannot half-heartedly pretend to believe in something and in the back of your mind not believe it as that is counter-productive and the reason it WILL fail.

Negatively speaking; if you believe what you desire should come to you then you are already in the wrong frame of mind and the one that will not manifest anything other than an increase in that negative thinking. Intention and attitude are everything when it comes to manifesting your goals and dreams. Appreciation and gratitude for all that you have been blessed with so far is the only way to change a negative frame of mind. If you think or believe that you’ve just not been given the opportunities you deserve I hope that you already see and realize that you are blocking yourself. There is an abundance of opportunities but when you don’t have appreciation for the little things you end up building a wall around you that prevents you from ever seeing the bigger things you have access to.

The same statement as above applies here as well except in opposite effect. If you are unable to connect or tap into the abundance that the Universe has to offer it is because you believe within every fibre of your being that it should come to you. Good Luck with that!

Yes there are times when what we work toward doesn’t go as we may have envisioned but in my experiences I’ve discovered that it has always led me to something better. Even though a vision changes or is changed for another reason I still view it as success because it takes me in a direction that I never considered and it’s always a better fit for me. I believe that what we envision and the directions we seek to go in are ultimately and divinely guided by the Universe and I have no reason to question that. I know the Universe is a force of all things positive and there is no better reinforcement than that.

Everything I have been taught from the time I can remember through every experience has provided me with the incentive I need to passionately pursue what I desire without pause. If you really want something, you go for it, bottom line!

Words are great, they can be inspiring and motivating, but actions are what prove the words true!

actions, words

 
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Posted by on September 4, 2014 in Blog

 

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R.E.S.P.E.C.T.

What it All Means to Me!

respectThis word or as I see it, “state of grace”, seems to come so easy to some but yet can be so difficult for others, anyone living without respect is depriving themselves of all the gifts that come with it.

I grabbed this definition from the internet and there were many but I think this one encompasses the aspects that are a little blurred in society today.

Respect:

It means valuing each other’s points of views. It means being open to being wrong. It means accepting people as they are. It means not dumping on someone because you’re having a bad day. It means being polite and kind always, because being kind to people is not negotiable. It means not dissing people because they’re different to you. It means not gossiping about people or spreading lies.

Respect is basic, the unwritten golden rule, and it’s not just about respecting others, there is respect for yourself, life, animals, earth, the environment and many more. When you have basic respect it flows effortlessly into everything you do, it feeds all self-nurturing aspects in yourself and others, like self-worth, pride of accomplishment and a job well done, not just done!

Respect lies within every experience and when you live and breathe it daily in your life so much wisdom and personal rewards will be gained.

What it All Means to Me:

We teach others how to treat us and what we are willing to accept and I haven’t been the greatest at standing my ground when I know I feel lessened and/or weakened in spirit by another. In the past I have allowed others to lower the level of respect I deserve because I felt I was being disrespectful or mean if I said otherwise.

I do find that as I learn to further embrace my strength my direction in life becomes more defined and the vision ahead takes a different but stronger and better focused shape.

Respect is the cornerstone to all aspects of life, it goes hand in hand with our personal integrity, it is the foundation of all successful relationships and when coupled with gratitude respect and many other states of being are enhanced. If you have gratitude/appreciation for where you are now and the blessings you’ve had in your life you won’t experience as much resistance on your path. Whenever I’ve questioned the Universe as to why a circumstance is so challenging I come across someone who is experiencing it at a deeper level and I am immediately humbled.

The Universe speaks to you through your inner spirit, your gut instinct to help guide you to the path you are meant to walk and it is always to your benefit to listen.

When you allow your inner spirit and voice to be heard you give yourself the opportunity to share and bond with the Universe and those in it as you were meant to and when you tune into that alignment magical things happen!

respect, magnificent world

 
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Posted by on May 21, 2014 in Blog

 

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Come and Gone

Everyone leaves their Mark!

The memory of those we’ve lost will carry on within those they’ve known and/or inspired.  Everyone leaves an indelible mark on the people whose lives they’ve truly touched, whether it was for a short or long period of time.

People within all walks of life can inspire personal growth and positive change in someone and their status in life is irrelevant.  It’s who you are with others, how you treat them and in turn how they respond that makes the difference.  My #1 mantra in life as quoted by Ralph Waldo Emerson below is the mark I want to leave.  I know I’ve quoted it often but it bears repeating for they are truly words to live by and aspire to.

ralph waldo emerson quote

What got me thinking about this particular topic have been all the awards shows that have been airing in the last couple of weeks.  There is a certain point in every awards show that is my favorite moment for two reasons and both touch opposite sides of the emotional spectrum.  It is the point when acknowledgement of those in their industry that they have lost for that specific year are remembered.

  • I’m Happy, because they are being honored for their contribution and because I’ve have had the opportunity to see the beauty of work they’ve created through their unique style of artistic expression.

and;

  • I’m Sad, because they are gone and I won’t see their specific brand of artistic expression again and especially so when the loss is at an earlier age.  All life is valuable but the loss seems to feel greater when there was so much more life ahead.

Even though they are gone it is likely that they’ve inspired one or many other artists in one way or another and through that inspiration emulation of the admired aspect will allow that artist to have some version of themselves live on through the generations.  The reason we know of them is not because they are greater than others but because the profession they have chosen to enter into is highly publicized.

I use the entertainment/celebrity world as contrast here because there are many people that touch and affect our lives and even though they aren’t highly publicized in life it doesn’t diminish the mark they’ve left.  That is evidenced every day through the various expressions of remembering and memorializing our loved ones so that our most cherished memories of them continue to have positive influence in our lives.

I believe that one of the most influential figures of this time has been Princess Diana, obviously not everyone in the world met or had a connective bond with her personally but her impact globally was epic.

Assumably for most, like myself, I had developed an attachment, an appreciation for her not only because of what she presented but because that presentation was authentically herself without any excuse and that is what made her real, we could identify with her on many levels.

Similarly I can develop just as much appreciation but to a greater extent for those that I have personal connection to and their impact on me is stronger because of that close connection.

Connection to others through whatever wavelength you channel has the opportunity to grow and strengthen the bond as time and shared experiences evolve.  Each of those connections leave imprints on our psyche and in our hearts that transcend beyond the physical world.

I am a creative mix of my family and heritage as well as the environment I grew up in, influenced by many people that have left their mark in my life even if they weren’t aware of it.  I’ve had the pleasure of observing and learning from people that have had such a positive influence on my life just by modelling aspects that I admire and aspire to emulate.  These qualities that I have most admired in these people have helped shape my personality and enriched my life and in that regard some version of them will live on through me because of it.

creation of god, destiny

 
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Posted by on January 30, 2014 in Blog

 

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Acknowledging Those that Make a Difference!

Ordinary People Who Are Extraordinary

Acknowledging those make a difference is not something we always remember these days, I think mostly because our lives are so full that when it does get to the end of the day we haven’t completed everything on our ever growing “To Do Lists” and it’s become too late to in the day to make that acknowledgement.

There is a commercial that came on at Christmas time this last year, it is a mother and her son wrapping little thank-you gifts, she gives some to her son to give out to whomever he chooses.  She is giving her son a GREAT gift by teaching him the beauty of appreciation and gratitude and the true spirit of Christmas.  The gifts are not extravagant (a small box of chocolates and bag of candy, etc), but thought (no matter what the gift) is still thought, and that in itself is significant.  He gives these gifts to the people you wouldn’t expect (not because they didn’t deserve it but because I think it is the Universe’s way of providing us all with a reminder not to overlook anyone), which given how busy most of are within our lives, makes sense.  He gave one to the man who cleans the ice at his local rink, one to the man who delivers the mail, I wish I could remember the rest of the people he gives them to but I think you get the idea.

extraordinary things

Of all the commercials I’ve seen, this one had a really great message to share and looking at life from that little boy’s perspective was a reminder well served for me.

I’ve experienced both sides of this action, I’ve been the one acknowledging someone’s contribution because it has inspired me and have also had someone acknowledge mine.  There is a benefit to both sides but sometimes I’ve felt like I’m the one who has benefitted more from acknowledging another person because the “state of gratitude” can feel intoxicating and if you are a sensitive person (which I am), then you may also feel the other person’s emotion as well, so it’s doubly intoxicating and kind of addictive.

I think that all of us enjoy being acknowledged and/or appreciated and even the simplest action can sometimes change a persons’ entire day.  Depending on the action it can possibly propel them into a direction that changes their entire outlook or life.

For those that want to create good karma in their lives, this is one of those ways that you create it but the intention MUST be pure.  You cannot be doing good deeds with the intention of creating good karma for yourself, it has to be good deeds with the intention of making another person’s life a little bit better, it’s those unintentional good deeds that lead to GREAT karma.

It’s important to honor, appreciate and have gratitude for the people in our lives that make a difference, no matter how big that difference is “every contribution counts”.  Sometimes it’s the little moments when nothing monumental is happening that have the most profound effects.

The one person that inspires me the absolute most is my daughter, she’s 14 today.  Happy Birthday Felicity!

Next time someone you cross paths with inspires you, let them know.

gratitude can transform

 
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Posted by on May 22, 2013 in Blog

 

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