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The Strength of Energy

There are No Limits!

Everyone carries their own energy and that energy feeds whatever thoughts you embrace the most. If you are embracing the negative than the Universe will respond by bringing to you more negativity. If you embrace the positive than the Universe will respond by bringing to you all things positive.

It seems like a no brainer to me, why would anyone choose to let negativity run their life, it doesn’t make you happy that’s for sure. In fact anyone negative that I’ve ever encountered I can’t get away from them fast enough because the energy feels heavy, sickening, dirty and dark. We all have good energy but when you let negative experiences define and cripple you the cloud of negativity cloaks it until you throw it off.

Negativity grows in the environment that feeds it best and that environment is bad thoughts, attitude or outlook on life. These areas feed how your future is going to play out so if you feel stuck in any way in any area of your life just know that that is negativity’s way in. As far as I’m concerned there are no limits to what you can achieve, only options. When you don’t see those options it’s because they are clouded by your ego, the ego that tells you “you can’t do it”. Your ego works in conjunction with negativity and with those two running the show you will never be in control of your life or steering it in the direction you hope and want it to go.

The overall tone of each day is a conscious choice to either allow the little things to get to you or not, that is really how it all begins.

Like when you wake up late and you’re in a panic to get moving as quickly as possible and everything you do keeps interrupting your flow and setting you further back on the clock. I’ve had this occur and in retrospect I’ve realized that it’s not necessarily that my movements are set back any further than any other day but rather that I’m racing against a time that isn’t going to stop moving and there’s no way I’m going to make the deadline I had planned. My best option for the day is to embrace that I’m late, pick a new time frame a little farther ahead for my goal of getting myself together and on with my day. Think about it you’re already late, you’re not going to get that time back no matter how much you race around. So how the day goes (good or bad) depends on your choice to embrace the lateness or to let it define the rest of your day.

Negative or Positive is a choice, one that is probably the single most important decision determining the outcome of your well-being on a daily basis.

If you are feeling like you have no options take a few moments to recognize that these are not the thoughts of truth from your inner spirit, they are the negative cell(s) in your body that are fighting with your gut instincts to be in control. Your gut instincts knows your truth and that is why you always need to listen to them, it’s not just for direction but for your emotional, physical and spiritual well-being.

Have you ever felt like you belong in an area of life different from where you currently are but can’t get there because you feel stuck or trapped? That is the cloud of negativity doing its thing, working your thoughts to make you believe you have no options and your instincts (that you’ve quieted to a dull whisper) know the truth but you won’t allow them to have their say.

The cloud of negativity absolutely loves to be in control and if you are feeling bad about yourself in any way then negativity is in the lead. The first step to changing that around is making the decision to do so, step by step to get to where you want to go, like checking off the “to do list” and fitting the pieces of a puzzle together. Everything in life worth having is worth building and everything that has been built has steps to get to the end result. Write it out in 5 or 10 steps to start, if you can do the small steps, next thing you know you may be halfway through to your goal.

Your inner spirit and personal truth is the untainted, unbiased area of that which is you, your subconscious is the default zone of your conscious thinking. Altering just your conscious thoughts are not enough, the area of your true beliefs lie within your subconscious. So basically, you can tell yourself something and plan that is going to change an area of your life but if in your sub-conscious (in the back of your mind), you are telling yourself something else, it will never work. The thoughts you say to yourself on a daily basis are the ones that determine your emotional, physical and spiritual well-being.

There are certain things I read that just don’t make sense in my mind and I like the use of analogies to further explain so here’s mine for this thought. I’ve had this conversational debate with a few people, it’s to do with food and weight because of course everyone wants to find a better way to boost their physical health and of course why not? I’ve had many people comment on my appetite with food and honestly I do eat a lot but their comments are to do with the lack of excessive weight that they feel I should gain based on my intake. Every single time I say “I’m not worried, nothing sticks to me”, now I do take into consideration that genetically my family has always been big eaters without issue but I do not believe that this is the sole reason. I can tell you I honestly, honestly believe that statement “I’m not worried, nothing sticks to me” with every fibre of my being, consciously, subconsciously, everywhere!

I’ve talked with friends who say “ok, yes I’m going to try that” and then they say “but I know it’s not going to work”. Right there!   That’s the statement they are firmly planting in their subconscious and the universe responds “as you wish”.

This is where it all starts, this is the key to all things you want to change for the better, it starts in your subconscious. Pay very close attention to what you tell yourself, you may think it’s insignificant but when you put it into this context it becomes very significant and very important!

Surrounding yourself with like-minded souls will elevate your own in ways that motivate you to break down the barriers that are placed on your path by both yourself and those that want to hold you back.

The best choice you can make for yourself is to seek out those that nurture and inspire your spirit positively and unconditionally. When you find this place in your life you will realize that there are no limits to what you can do!

BY_CHO~1

 
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Posted by on June 29, 2014 in Blog

 

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The Seeds of Greatness!

Are at the Core of your Spirit

Peeling back the layers of life that have caused your spirit to be cloaked by any negative emotion as a result of your experiences is what allows your true essence to shine!

Where was I Then?

Your youth is where it all begins, where patterns, habits and learned behaviours are formed. You are meant to learn and grow from your experiences not be crippled by them. If your environment doesn’t contain any sort of positive aspects then your outlook of possibilities may be diminished. Your role models are the biggest influences in creating your view on the world, how they model their ability to deal with life experiences is very influential and will either be motivational or damaging. Some behaviours pass through more than one generation and are viewed as “normal” because that is all you know, especially when you are young. It is only when you start to develop into your own independence that you become aware of the inconsistencies. Most times you seek out those that fit the same behavioural pattern that is so familiar and I think eventually you either break away from it or fall into the same mold because it is too far outside of your comfort zone.

I think the biggest and most crippling aspect of this is that you can end up going through many life experiences without really experiencing them because the pattern is so ingrained that you run on auto-pilot and never realize that there is more to your life than just the day to day run of existence.

Where am I Now?

Asking yourself the big questions that are beginning to resonate in your soul are both important and necessary. If it matters to you, it matters! If you’re feeling like there’s something more that you want to reach for or experience within your life there is never a time when it is too late. All change or transformation begins with a first step – the decision. The decision, which doesn’t sound like a huge step, actually is but following through is even bigger. Once you’ve taken those very critical two first steps you start to fall back in alignment with the Universe (I call it being in the Zone, athletes will totally know what I mean) and the Universe only works to create what is meant for you.

Believe me, we are all meant to experience life positively, it is when we fall out of alignment that things start to go sideways.

Where will I Go?dr suess quote #3

Once you’ve taken on a more positive outlook and continue to search or have found your new path the places you can go become infinite possibilities! Listen to Dr. Suess, it’s not just meant for children!

I strive to inspire, motivate and cultivate all things positive and continue to seek deeper awareness and understanding. Every day I learn, every day I come across new meaning to parts of life I didn’t realize existed and every day I am enlightened, humbled and impressed!

Don’t let negative life experiences prevent you from living the life you are meant for or deserve. Make the decision that “it stops here!” and immediately change direction, you can do anything you set your mind to!

At your core you’re all things pure and good and when you realize the amount of strength you and all of us have been given, success and happiness is just a short period of time away and all it takes for you to get there from here is your decision to do it.

Make the change that changes your life!

 
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Posted by on May 28, 2014 in Blog

 

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You Have the Power

To Change your Story

The life you live is your choice, Always! 

If your life is not the way you like it you can change it, there are always options and the only reason you may feel trapped at times is because you won’t allow yourself to see those options.  There are always obstacles in life to overcome to reach the desired destination but it is your choice as to whether you are going to let those options stand in your way or if you are going to find an alternate route around them.  If you give up and quit, that is because you have made the conscious decision that you are not going to succeed but it isn’t the obstacles that prevented you from moving forward it was you!

Story, Wooden peg and colorful words series on rope

Obstacles are on your path to challenge and teach you that anything worth having is worth fighting for and to help build who you are to become.  Stepping outside your comfort zone is where your biggest opportunities lie and it’s not that you are going to be successful with everything you try but taking a chance will build your self-worth and not taking the chance will lower it.  I have personally found that even if the road I’ve travelled doesn’t pan out I feel pride because at least I tried it.  Regret, in my opinion, sucks the life out of your self-worth, self-pride and self-respect and will continue to drain that part of your psyche until you let go and resolve to move forward with a life plan that better builds you.

I’ve taken chances and risks to walk on many different paths in the effort to find the one that is truly my own and I don’t believe I’m done yet.  There always seems to be another level even higher than the last that I need to reach for next and every step I take leads me to new discoveries, sometimes daily.  Discoveries that tantalize and inspire my inner creativity with insight into new and exciting prospects, prospects I hadn’t even considered.  Letting go of fear is your only option for moving forward, fear can be paralyzing and it lives only in your mind, it’s not an actual circumstance.  Danger and extreme peril, both are actual circumstances that can evolve to exist but fear is a component of the mind, created by the mind.

When you become stuck it is because there is something in your emotion (usually fear) that is continuing to cycle and reminding you that you can’t get there from here but really you can, you just have to find another route.

Just because you’ve fallen down doesn’t mean you stay there, the only reason you are unable to see a way out or up is because your vision is clouded but it can and will clear if you want and allow it to.  Letting go of the fear to take a chance is the single most important step you need to take to move in the direction you seek, if you don’t know the direction look within, all the answers you will ever need are in there. 

If your story is not going the way you want you may have quieted your instincts so much that they are barely an audible whisper but the more you allow them to have a voice the louder they will get.  Your instincts, intuition, inner voice, however you want to refer to it will never guide you to a place that isn’t necessary for your personal growth but you are not meant to get stuck there.

I absolutely love Jane Fonda’s analogy of this kind of emotional challenge, I can’t quote it verbatim but it is somewhere along these lines; every time you exercise you create little miniscule tears in the muscle (that sore, tired feeling after exercise, like you really worked out), these tears heal quite quickly and become stronger and so muscle grows.  This is like the emotional challenges, they make little tears in our emotion and we heal and become stronger because of the experience, it’s not that we are broken but rather broken open and the opportunity for positive change and new beginnings can be the result of that experience if you don’t allow it to define you.

We all deserve to live the life we hope for and envision and there is no such thing as too late or too old.  You know your heart and inner spirit better than anyone and you know when you are going against it because inner war is the result, that conflict creates negativity that can spiral into dark areas that can damage you significantly, sometimes altering you into an entirely different person.  I do believe that everything happens for a reason and even though negative experiences are needed for growth, as are positive, they can sometimes create a tornado effect within you and the only way to stop it is to take away its wind.

Take back your power, surround yourself with people that build and inspire you, live and breathe positive thinking and change your story!

what if

 
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Posted by on March 5, 2014 in Blog

 

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The Relationship Within

Be Your Own Champion!

The most important relationship you will ever have is the one with yourself. 

I believe the relationship within travels a different path in everyone.  Sometimes we treat others better, sometimes we treat others worse but we should be treating ourselves the same way we treat others because when we start scaling ourselves against each other inner emotions start to feed the ego.  Respect for yourself first leads to respect for others and for life itself, respect is the key component to maintaining healthy relationships and gratitude the key for keeping the ego in check.  A relationship without respect or gratitude will inevitably become toxic and the length of time spent in a toxic relationship can determine the length of time it may take you to get over the emotional damage created from it.

respect yourself

Trying and failing will always be better than failing to try!

Failing to try will lower every form of how your value yourself, taking action will enhance your inner spirit and be a great reminder to you that nothing is going to keep you down.  Action is very motivating as well as rewarding because at the very least, whether success was achieved or not, your self-worth and inner devotion is nurtured, acknowledge and validated.  It doesn’t matter whether you win or lose, of course succeeding is always hoped for and welcomed but it doesn’t define you nor should you let it.  Regret is usually the experienced effect from wondering how things may have turned out had you tried and the best reason for at least taking a shot.  Regret stays with you, it stays there to remind you that you didn’t believe in yourself enough when you needed to and that exact same opportunity likely won’t present itself again.  We attract what we need when we need it and your personal growth and self-evolvement depend on you taking advantage of opportunities when they arise.  They aren’t presented at any old time, the Universe has carefully constructed all the necessary components needed to be in place to ensure your success.  Your emotional state of being, awareness and circumstance needs to be in alignment and the Universe knows when all of this comes together.  This isn’t just a guess, coincidence or dumb luck, everything happens when and how it’s supposed to and you are only asked to trust it and have faith.  If success doesn’t occur it’s not because you are a failure, it’s because it wasn’t meant to.  Success isn’t always what we think it is, I’ve learned plenty of lessons through failure and that is what turns out to be the success.  That education gave me the experience I needed to succeed in the area I’m supposed to, an area that I might not have succeeded in had I not had the experience.  Not everything is meant to work perfectly but all lessons and opportunities are meant to teach and advance us in some way.

lifes lessons

What is the Universe trying to tell me? 

Don’t drive yourself crazy trying to figure things out, they will become clear when they are supposed to.  Everything happens for a reason, by design, by forces greater than us conspiring to make it happen, nothing happens by coincidence.  Fate or destiny, however you want to label it, all happen for reasons not yet known to us.  Reasons that will eventually become clear at the time you are most open to understanding and/or receiving it.  You aren’t always open and there are times when circumstance detracts your attention and obstacles manifest, whether you’ve attracted them through your thoughts or not. 

Remember:  whatever you give the most thought to is what will increase and be sure to keep in mind that even if your conscious thought is thinking about something it wants to attract, your subconscious thought may be thinking otherwise.  These two states of awareness have to be in alignment (working together) to be positively effective.

For example: 

–          If you are thinking you want to lose weight consciously but your subconscious mind is telling you that it’s just not going to happen, then it definitely will not happen.

–          If you are thinking you want to quit a habit that is affecting your life negatively but your subconscious comes up with all sorts of reasons as to why it’s not going to work then you diffuse yourself before even starting and it definitely will not happen.

Not all but most of us have a habit of sabotaging our own efforts for a variety of reasons but there is one in particular that is most often behind it all and that is concession; acceptance and acknowledgement of defeat.  Giving up before you even begin to try is a good way to prevent failing but it’s a great way to prevent success, what you don’t realize is that you’re failing yourself by not trying.  You’re telling your inner spirit (the one that you should be nurturing) sorry the ego is going to win on this one because it’s the strongest but in reality it’s not it’s just the one you are choosing to feed.

If there is something you want out of life but you believe you will never have it, you will definitely succeed at never having it.  Your thoughts are more powerful than you may realize so be careful which side of the spectrum you place them.

Positive thoughts produce positive actions and positive results!

No matter what aspect of your life you desire to adjust or improve your heart and mind must be in it together, as long as they are there is NOTHING you can’t do!

Feed your inner spirit first, acknowledge what it needs and thrives on, validate and reward yourself for personal victories along the way and success will surely follow.

Ghandi-Quote

 
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Posted by on February 26, 2014 in Blog

 

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You Are Enough!

Knowing Your Worth

Our value is very much attached and/or validated by our thoughts and our thoughts are fed through the Inner Dialogue of Self-Love and Self-Talk but that dialogue can be altered by outside influences during our weaker moments.

The weaker moments happen when you are feeling inferior, insecure or both and it causes you to question your self-worth in either one or all areas of your life but usually it’s only one area at a time.  I’ve found that I’m fairly confident when it comes to my career/work related area and I think that’s because there isn’t a lot of emotion attached because while it is the hand that feeds me (so to speak) it’s not the one that keeps me breathing.  My love (family & friends) is the area that keeps me breathing and feeds my inner spirit with all things that are beautifully and emotionally joyful and sometimes challenging.  Of course anything connected to emotion has the power to elevate you or take you down and it’s usually when you’re down that you question your worth.Jillian Quote

Self-Love:

You need to have enough self-love for yourself before you can offer your love to someone else and if you don’t trust yourself then how can you trust anyone else?

–         When you are passionate about who you are you exude a light of warmth and contentment that doesn’t need any outside influence for validation and what you project draws others to you without effort.

–         Trusting in a Faith you cannot see or touch are the seeds of Hope and it is through that Belief that the soul is nourished.

–         Humility and Gratitude Always!  Your Ego will constantly wrestle with you for control but it is these two states of being that give you the growth without changing who you authentically are.

Self-Talk:

What do you tell yourself about who you are and how others perceive you?

You shouldn’t have to prove anything to anyone for them to believe in you.  If someone really cares about you they don’t need proof, they feel it and they honor that feeling by showing unconditional support through whatever context the relationship exists.highlight reel

–         You are a human soul with feelings and what you tell yourself should be just as honest and compassionate as it is with others.

–         Don’t assume that someone is thinking negatively of you unless they’ve actually voiced it.  Any assumptions I’ve ever made in that area have caused me to feel bad about myself needlessly.

–         Regardless of what your past has been we all deserve forgiveness.  You cannot change what was but you can create anew of what is to come.  Regret can be a breeding ground for negative self-talk and does not serve any purpose except for allowing the Ego to gain control.  It is through positive change going forward that regret is silenced.

I do believe that it is through our formative years that our true identity is created and the core of our being does not change but our formative years are the foundation and what grows around that foundation depends on who we aspire to become.  Yes, circumstance and outside influences definitely affect that foundation but our formative years are from a very early age (0-5 years) and within that age category there isn’t a good or bad seed that is planted but rather exposed and we always have the free will to choose which direction we want to gravitate towards.

If you feel like your worth isn’t as strong as you’d like it to be, whether that is from the effects of the external stresses of existence or not I believe it is your Love (family & friends) that are the keys to reinforcing your strength.  When others have drained you, whether that is by your own allowance or not, it is usually your family, friends or both that help you put the pieces of the puzzle back together.  It’s not that you are broken but rather that you’ve forgotten just how special and important you are to those that love you and they are there to remind you of your worth.

We are all here to learn, to experience and to grow and even
though our challenges and life paths are different from one another, no one person’s light is more important.

the-same-moon

 
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Posted by on October 29, 2013 in Blog

 

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All Good Things in the Right Time!

Allowing the Universe to Set the Pace

I have my beliefs that I follow, one of them is having faith that things work out as they should and when they should, fighting or resisting the natural flow is pointless and usually very frustrating so it’s better for me to do what I need to do and allow the Universe to respond and set the pace.

I have many life goals that I want to achieve, all of which I have initiated and the most important aspect that I have to remain true to, is faith that the Universe will present the right opportunities when the time is perfectly right and not to try to force anything ahead of what is already divinely arranged.

The Universe provides us all with what we need but knows when the time is right and when we are most open to receive, accept and embrace.  I think there are definitely times when we don’t realize that we aren’t fully open and could be blocking ourselves in some way that isn’t easily recognizable for us so that we could change it.  I know that there have been a few times where I’ve thought “I’m ready” but things aren’t happening the way I’d hoped or when I’d hoped.  What I’ve realized much later is even though I thought was ready, it turns out I wasn’t, I just thought I was and thought I knew better but that was the ego thinking  (EGO:  Edging God Out – as in removing faith in what you cannot see)

I’m not over the top in my beliefs and everyone has their own right to choose, I’ve learned what works for me and what doesn’t and I have adjusted and lived my life accordingly.  Everyone should have the right to choose their own path and not be forced or coerced down one that doesn’t fully feel right or aligned with their inner core.  As much as I’d like to at times help or direct someone I care about down a path that I feel is best for them it is not my place to do so and I don’t walk in their shoes every day so I am not aware of all that occurs within, nor do I have the right to judge which path they choose, that is the beauty of “free will”.  Live and let live, I know I don’t like being told how I should be doing things so why should I expect that anyone else would.  I am always open and appreciative to hear the opinion and/or advice of others I respect and admire but the final decisions are ultimately mine to make.

Our ego can get the better of us at times because it inflates and infuses our thoughts into an over-exaggerated belief of self-prominence and knowledge.  What I’ve usually discovered later down the road in hindsight is usually very humbling and expands my awareness to a greater degree.

I believe the best course of action is to lay the groundwork, let the Universe respond when the time is right and be open to waiting for it and taking advantage of the opportunity when it presents itself, you will “feel it” when the opportunity is right, do not hesitate, seize the moment.  Trusting and believing that things will happen as they should and when they should is the key to enhancing your patience.  If something doesn’t go the way you’d hoped it usually takes you into a newer and better direction, one that turns out to be a better plan that maybe you never had thought of or considered.  Every single time I have maintained my belief and faith I have been rewarded with more opportunities than I could have imagined and that is enough of an indication for me to stay on the same track because it works great!  I don’t need to push the boundaries because things always tend to even out in the end so putting myself through additional stress trying to push or force something to happen is pointless.

faith quote

Like I said earlier I have many life goals that I’ve initiated, I have many hopeful desires for life direction that I will continue to focus my strongest thoughts on and I will do all that I need to achieve them but without force because the Universe will present the opportunities and if it isn’t what I’d hoped for, I know it will be something better, experience has taught me that lesson.

Remember your thoughts (positive or negative) are just as strong an influence on the direction your life goes as anything in your life and what you most think about will show up in your life so be very aware of what thoughts you have in both your conscious and sub-conscious mind.  In my opinion it is the sub-conscious mind that has the most power (the sub-conscious runs continually), you can say to yourself consciously that you wish and desire things one way but if you feel deep down (sub-consciously) that your thoughts really don’t fully believe than you could be your own downfall.

As an example to illustrate this theory, I myself utilize this same thought process but I also read it as an excerpt from one of the contributing writers in the book “The Secret”.  A woman spoke of having issues with her weight her whole life and when she started to utilize the theories in the “The Secret” that changed.  Her sub-conscious thoughts used to fully support her reasoning for having difficulty with controlling her weight, how she couldn’t lose it no matter how many different diets she tried or how much exercise she did.

In case you aren’t seeing what the common denominator is here she kept reinforcing negative thoughts that backed up why she couldn’t shed the unwanted pounds:

–         I tried exercise but can’t lose any weight

–         Everything I eat goes to my waist

–         I’ve tried all diets and nothing keeps it off

All of her inner responses and sub-conscious thoughts were reinforcing and allowing the negative to keep operating against her with excuses as to why it wasn’t working, making it ok to fail and justifying it.

It really does all begin with changing your thoughts as to where you can progress to and having faith that things will go in the direction you want.  So she changed her thoughts and reinforced them with positive ones

–         Exercise is taking off the excess I want to discard

–         Nothing is going to stick to me

–         This new diet of moderation with occasional reward is working

By the end of the story the woman had said she was down to her goal weight and maintaining it because of this change of thought process and that was within not only the conscious but sub-conscious mind.  You need to have both on board to be able to effect the change you want to see.

The same enhancement of thought goes for everything in your life including your faith and state of being and even though I’ve had my moments of doubt (which I believe everyone has at one time or another, it’s only natural and human), but bringing myself back to center and positive thinking will bring a much more relaxed state of happiness and healthy living.

–         Be Aware

–         Be Open

–         Be Gracious

–         Be Humble

The Universe will give you what you need when you live in these states of being.  Always remember that things could be so much worse and that breath of life is a gift that shouldn’t go unappreciated.

just have a little faith

 
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Posted by on August 31, 2013 in Blog

 

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A Very Challenging Time

My Daughter’s Scoliosis Journey

I started writing this post the night before my daughter was scheduled to go in for her first of two surgeries last week for correction of Scoliosis but I just couldn’t keep my mind focused or distracted enough on anything for any length of time to finish it.  My mind was clouded and consumed with many thoughts and they fluctuated into good and bad areas frequently.  The night before I was working hard to embrace my optimism and feeling very positive that the surgery was going to be seamless, after all it was her 10th surgery and she’s blown through all of them like a trooper but my underlying state was anxiety and fear, which is something I always have because there is something about anesthetic that scares me.  I knew that the recovery was expected to be long and possibly quite painful and like any parent, my strongest desire was to alleviate any and all discomfort she experienced but that was something I knew I would have absolutely no control over.

Regardless of how medically necessary I knew it was for her to have this surgery and no matter how many positive thoughts I had about how she would be down the road, I knew that it was the time in between those two points that was going to be difficult.

The doctor had advised that Scoliosis surgery is one of the big ones, right up there with heart surgery and I had to keep reminding myself that the best thing for me to focus on was that it could be worse.  She could have had something medical develop that has a lower likelihood of a positive outcome which some kids and parents have to go through and accept and of course I’m sure like every other parent that has to watch their child endure a big challenge, you can feel overwhelmed and helpless.  The need and desire to protect and “take away the hurt” is how I relate to hearing parents say the familiar phrase to their kids “this is going to hurt me more than it hurts you”.  It really does feel like you are bearing the entire weight of it all or trying to at least, and surprisingly most kids power through these things better than we might have initially expected.

I firmly believe that “Everything Happens for a Reason” and even though I don’t know what that reason is yet, I do know one thing for sure is that my daughter and I will be even more strongly bonded from going through this together then we were before.Felicity Scoliosis June 2013 - Cropped

I’m hoping these X-ray picture attachments are viewable for everyone, this one is a month before the surgery, it is a front view, her curve was on the right side of her torso on her back so her rib cage on the right side looked almost like it was winged out.  A curve of this degree (92%) and even further puts a lot of pressure on many different areas of the body, my daughter is special needs and non-verbal so knowing exactly how it was affecting her was not precise but I did notice that her oxygen capacity was definitely compromised, she tired just from walking across the room.  From December of last year to April of this year she had lost 25 pounds because she just wasn’t eating her usual, again hard to know exactly how strongly it was affecting her but the X-ray also showed that her spine was pushing inward as well which meant her stomach capacity may be compromised, hence the weight loss and lack of regular feed.

When the decision was finalized that a surgery date needed to be set it seemed like the worst day but as the time drew closer to that date I saw her quality of life was diminishing with each day that passed so I started to feel that the surgery couldn’t come soon enough, it seemed like she was suffering.

The surgery had to be done in two stages, each surgery is quite long in duration so doing the entire procedure at once was too much.  The first surgery had one hiccup but it wasn’t severe.  Like everything in the medical field, advancement in all procedures are ever evolving so the procedure for this surgery had a “less invasive advancement”, unfortunately my daughter’s system was so compromised from the curvature that the classic procedure was needed.  It was no worse off and she came through it really well.

The plan was to do the surgeries back to back so the 2nd stage was set for the following morning and it was the longer of the two procedures.  This is where things took a different turn which wasn’t necessarily a complication but rather a forced delay because her doctor is meticulous about every aspect of his patient’s well-being (one of the main reasons I have so much respect for him), so the last couple hours of the surgery were to be completed on a third day, again slated for the following morning.

All of these changes were very difficult for me and I spent a lot of time reeling myself from one end of the emotional spectrum to the other which was definitely not going to do either myself or my daughter any good.  From the time my daughter was born (prematurely 14 years ago) I’ve had to step back and let doctors do what they need to do and trust that they are doing the right thing.  As a parent our programming is to protect and when you are forced out of that space because you aren’t able to give them what they need it can be difficult, terrifying and overwhelming.  Even though I am a positive minded person when any sort of complication or delay arose I would find my thoughts racing into the worst places and I was unable to control them.  My logical and intellectual mind was completely overruled and overwhelmed by my emotional connection to my daughter, she is absolutely everything in my heart and it killed me to not be able to do anything.  Even now when I think about it I still feel emotional, I think it’s impossible to separate the two when it comes to our children, no matter how strong you are.

The doctor successfully completed her surgery and she is now beautifully straight and has many opportunities for advancement ahead of her.  I don’t think I could fully convey my gratitude toward the doctor and his team for basically saving her life, she can breathe with ease now.  Without this surgery she could have had a multitude of medical difficulties that could plague her continually into the future, let alone the fact that her oxygen intake was on a steady decline and there’s no way to know how much but with the direction she had been heading it didn’t seem positive.  Simply stated, without breath, you don’t have life.Felicity Scoliosis Aug 2013 - Cropped

This X-ray picture is post-surgery, she now has a rod fused to either side of her spine in the thoracic region and many screws (I think 11 a side, total 22) to keep the rods in place to her spine.  It sounds really harsh, and it is, and honestly I’m surprised in a week after surgery she doesn’t have a lot of pain, part of that is that she does have a high pain tolerance but I also think it is a good indication of how much pain and/or discomfort she was in enduring prior to the surgery.

There were additional issues into recovery, the biggest concern is always infection because this is such a big surgery and unfortunately my daughter ended up with 2 infections.  The full extent and effect these infections had on my daughter’s threshold and tolerance cannot fully be determined but she ended up having a seizure on day 3 post-op and honestly that just did me in.  My own tolerance for remaining strong was severely challenged at that point and my mind could no longer carry my positive thoughts, I was devastated and terrified.  The good news is that the infections she developed are treatable and the seizure could have been caused by all the extenuating factors that contributed to her low threshold.  Regardless, as a precautionary measure she is being treated for an additional infection to cover off the seizure, which is believed to be associated with Meningitis.  As I stated earlier all of these infections are treatable, serious but treatable so I know the worst is over.

I think besides the fact that I’d had little sleep due to worry and anxiety over her well-being and surgical outcome, the most difficult aspect was trying to absorb all the information the various doctors now involved because of the seizure were advising.  The doctors have their own language and get involved in discussion while trying to find the best course of action, unfortunately for the layman that isn’t knowledgeable on medical terms it can be scary to listen to so it’s really important to ask questions to clarify so you aren’t left with your own thoughts as I was.  My imagination has always been something I’ve had to reel in because left to my own devices I will blow things farther out of proportion than they are and in a medical situation like this I can be my own worst enemy.

That all being said, after much clarification and solid discussion with the many specialists I have finally been able to direct my efforts to what my daughter and I do best together, which is recovery.  A little hard work has never deterred either of us and it won’t now, she is on the mend and onto a healthier and happier life.

I WANT TO EXTEND MY SINCEREST THANKS AND DEEPEST GRATITUDE TO DR. MIYANJI AND HIS SPINE TEAM AT BC CHILDREN’S HOSPITAL, ADDITIONAL SPECIALISTS AND MANY NURSES WHO WERE ALL INVOLVED IN FELICITY’S PRE AND POST SURGERY CARE.   

IT TRULY TAKES VERY SPECIAL PEOPLE TO DEDICATE THEIR LIVES TOWARD THE HEALTH AND WELL-BEING OF OTHERS.

a life that matters

 
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Posted by on August 25, 2013 in Blog

 

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If You Don’t Have Anything Positive to Say

Maybe Don’t Say Anything At All!

Some things are better left unsaid, if all you have to offer someone is your fear and doubt than why does it need to be voiced?  Projecting your negativity onto someone else is usually unwanted and never fair to them.  Everyone has their own issues and challenges that they have to deal with throughout their lives and no one needs the addition of negativity when they are trying to maintain a positive frame of mind.  Depending on their current circumstance your negativity could be what breaks them in that moment.no negativity sign

The phrase “misery loves company” could be referenced when it comes to negativity but my opinion is that a person can feel very alone in their thoughts and may try desperately to rid themselves of those feelings but that projection usually creates more guilt and shame and may be the start of an unwanted cycle.

What we give our energy to is what manifests in our lives so the state of being you are focusing on most is what you can expect to see show up in your life.  Our minds are so much more powerful than I think we realize when it comes to having the ability within to manifest what we most desire and we can create significant change, the big question is what kind of change do you want to see occur?  Are your intentions in alignment with that desire, is your focus so determined that there can be no other outcome?  I’m sure most everyone would easily answer “of course I want positive things to occur” but if you’re putting all your energy into preparing for the worst how can you possibly expect the positive to manifest amid all that negativity?

Negativity is heavy, it’s draining and can feel like walking around with a piano tied to you, depending on how much you are letting it control your outlook will determine how much it holds you back.  Now imagine if someone else comes along and ties their piano to you too, after that happens you may not be going anywhere and it can get harder and harder to get yourself free.

If you are already expecting the worst in any situation then you will likely get what you have already embraced.

state of your life, mind

You can induce miracles or tragedy, it’s a no-brainer for me as to which side of this I live on daily but we have our moments of vulnerability when we question circumstance simply because our immune system of will gets low.  It’s in these moments that a negative thinker has the window of opportunity to spread their virus, it’s the equivalent of walking up to someone and sneezing on them, there are times when we just don’t have the inner strength to fight it off.

Our thoughts manifest to create change, not all change is negative and change occurs based on our dominant thoughts and feelings, whether we realize it or not.  Be very aware of your daily thoughts, feelings and actions because you may not realize what you are manifesting if you are careless.

It’s ok for us to be aware of the downsides of any situation but it doesn’t mean we need to focus on it so intently that we manifest the outcome we don’t actually want.

Not everything works out as we sometimes hope or plan for but not everything is meant to, change exists to propel us into a different direction and sometimes the challenge in going in another direction has manifested to help us grow and learn.

We don’t come out on the other side of challenges without being provided the gift of wisdom, insight or growth.  The point is though that even if you feel the direction went the opposite of where you were hoping at least you didn’t encourage that direction to be worse than by thinking negatively.

For those that struggle with overcoming negative thoughts it will be a big challenge to make the change to the positive side, it will be hard work, but well worth it and I can assure you there is no better choice!

opportunity, difficulty

 
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Posted by on July 17, 2013 in Blog

 

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Take Control of Your Power!

Your Strength Lies Within

Everyone has the potential to be great and what you feed into (positive or negative) weighs heavily on what the outcome may be.  When you don’t reach that greatness it doesn’t mean you don’t deserve it or it’s not part of your destiny.  It could be that you are feeding into the possibility that “you can’t” succeed rather than “you can” and that mindset is something we can build ourselves through fear and insecurity.  Fear can seem overwhelming because in our minds we’ve built it up that big, but we have the ability within us to change that obstacle from a mountain to a mole hill, it’s all perception.

believe in yourself

“A change of feeling is a change of destiny”  –  Neville

I believe that a large part of “taking control of your power” is found within being vulnerable, even though that vulnerability feels scary, it’s ultimately empowering.  The reason it’s empowering is because it takes a great deal of courage to embrace vulnerability and allow the chips to fall where they may.  Being vulnerable helps you discover that you innately have a reserve of strength to draw from that you didn’t know was there and that experience is not only empowering but also humbling.  We don’t always give ourselves the credit we deserve when it comes to our own personal power.  It’s hard enough when another person is discouraging by not believing in you but when you also do not believe in yourself you begin to limit your life opportunities and options and that’s just not right.

My personal inner voice and reaction to anything fear based and negative is that “I am not going to let it conquer or defeat me”, I will persevere, backing out is not an option!

My positive mind says “No Way is fear going to be allowed to win.  Turn around and go back where you came from, you have no business here!”

Negative thoughts like fear or failure don’t stand a chance when you affirm with yourself and the universe that you’re strong and you’re not giving up.  Things only occur because we acknowledge their presence in our existence, everything start with a thought.  Don’t think negatively and negative things will not occur.

By following Neville’s Law of Assumption you can increase your success in any or all areas of your life that you want to improve:

“If this assumption is persisted in until it becomes your dominant feeling, the attainment of your ideal is inevitable”

greatness within

Once you’ve accepted yourself for who you are, others will also accept you for who you are.  When you begin to accept and believe in yourself you won’t put as much emphasis on needing to feel accepted by others and that ease of contentment and peace is a quality that others will gravitate toward and relate to.

I always love hearing a good line from a movie and my most recent that I want to share with you is one that I thought was very inspiring and something we should all aspire to, it’s similar to my own thoughts about having faith in humanity.  The more people believe in others, the more others will rise to the occasion.

“I like to think that if you put your trust out there, I mean if you really give people the benefit of the doubt, see their best intentions that they’re going to want to live up to it.  It doesn’t always work out but more often than not I think that if you do, people will rise to the occasion.  I really do believe that!”

 
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Posted by on May 15, 2013 in Blog

 

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Serendipity is Magical!

Don’t Chase Destiny, Let it Find You

My interpretation of Serendipity is allowing destiny to unfold as the universe has intended and embracing those moments along the way.  Even if that Serendipity is not something you’ve had on your radar of desires I think it’s important to at least acknowledge and consider the possibilities.  I’ve attached the actual definition I googled below:

Serendipity:  an aptitude for making desirable discoveries by accident

I experienced specific times when Serendipity was at play and I always used to refer to those times as Divine Intervention, although I don’t think it really matters how you personally interpret it, just that you recognize and/or allow it into your life to work its magic.

If you think back to the insignificant moments in your life that ultimately had a bigger impact then you had realized at the time, ask yourself, did you embrace those moments or resist them?  Or were they so casual at the time that you weren’t aware of their part in the bigger picture?  When you make these connections later it’s amazing to see how integral certain moments were and how different the direction of your life may have been had those casual encounters not occurred.

There are probably a lot of ways you can reflect and evaluate each and every occurrence in your life but I think mostly I’m asking about the moments that felt oddly familiar or significant in some way, but you can’t quite put your finger on it.  I’m sure there are many and there are a few for me that are still unanswered that I haven’t put the pieces together on yet and I’m looking forward to that moment of clarity.

destiny

It’s a matter of trusting and believing that your destiny (whatever that may be) will present itself when the time is perfectly right and having faith that your destiny is in alignment with all the seeds you have sewn so far.  We are all meant to have good in our lives, it’s unfortunate that we can get too sidetracked by the negative aspects in our human existence but they are there to test our strength of character and sometimes tempt us down the wrong path.  These challenges can seem impassable but they are always valuable lessons that are necessary to our destiny.  I do believe that there is always hope to change a path that is causing any kind of turmoil in your life and I think the best way to interpret difficulty is to realize that these tests are tough because you are meant for greater things that require greater strength and that difficulty will shape you into the person you need to be to live your specific destiny.

My bottom line:

–          Don’t cut yourself off from embracing something just because it is unknown, have faith that “Everything happens for a Reason”, the reason will become clear to you when you are fully ready for it.

–          Don’t let negativity win, you are more powerful than you may think or realize at this time

–          Do try to find the silver lining even in the difficult times for it will lead to a more positive state of being, which is the kryptonite to negativity.

Serendipity occurs to remind you that there is still magic left in your life and when those moments occur; embrace them, allow them to play out without resistance and I bet it will lead you to a life you couldn’t have imagined or written for yourself.

serendipity

 
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Posted by on April 24, 2013 in Blog

 

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