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Wanting to Exhale

It’s How You Breathe!

In the last couple of months I’ve had some challenges that have been hard to handle at certain moments (to say the least) but they have allowed me to step a little bit outside of myself at times so I could observe the plans ahead and the placement of those in my life. How things come together or apart and how people step in and out of our lives, usually at the right times. The only words I can think of to describe it all is “weirdly wonderful timing” because even though I know that the universe knows all and the best laid plans don’t always materialize, those that pop in and out of our lives at specific times are all part of the bigger picture/plan, it still blows my mind at how it all plays out.

My daughter had some more challenges in the last couple weeks that seem to be an aftershock-like effect from her surgery, all the trauma and fluctuation of her entire system, of course who wouldn’t? The body is not meant to have to go through such big changes and especially in such a short period of time but she seems to be finally bouncing back, at least that’s my continued hope and prayer.

It’s in the difficult times that you really discover who’s on your team!

I want to let all of those who I know are on my team know that even though you may have thought your support was insignificant it was noticed. Even though I may have at times said I was ok when I didn’t feel so much that way, the fact that you checked was noticed. Even though I know I put some of you off for a visit to make sure I was ok, when I definitely wasn’t, I want you to know that it wasn’t because I didn’t want to see you, it was because I couldn’t. Your compassion was too overwhelming and my emotions were sitting too close to the surface to suppress them and my dignity to maintain my strength was all I had left.

I think when you have the moment to step outside yourself and reflect it’s always a great opportunity. There is greater clarity outside the confines of our own psyche and it’s in that zone that I believe we can find the answers to questions that have eluded us and the opportunity to find out more about what you are looking for in your life.

I discovered that I had two different life challenges working against each other which weren’t beneficial for my daughter’s recovery process. I am overly ambitious and wanted to get a plan going that helps her get well in the best way possible. I’m not a doctor so medically I can’t do anything to make things better but I am her mother so I’m going to try to break down every wall to find a way. When I get my mind on a direction I take off running but when it comes to something like physical recovery (especially someone else’s recovery), taking off running doesn’t work out so well. The recovery goes on her timetable, not mine, so I can make all the plans I want for progressing forward but if her system isn’t ready, it isn’t ready, plain and simple.

The other life challenge is patience, which in my opinion, impedes progress for ambition. I’m sure that there are many people that have been able to find the happy medium for these two to work together but my maternal and protective nature wants to change things for the better for my daughter not later, but now! If it were me, I would definitely be motivated but not as strongly as I am when it comes to my daughter and of course that’s because for me, it’s her world that matters the most!

One thing I have noticed is that when I’m not gripping so tightly to trying to make things work, they seem to find a different, and usually better, way to just work out. Like everything just falls into place naturally and I think that is also the universe telling me something; that things will happen naturally if I just let them.

2 Comments

Posted by shelleyhallmark on November 26, 2013 in Blog

Tags: everything happens when it should, faith, life challenges, live positive, maternal instinct, opportunity, patience, universal wisdom

Don’t Ever Be Done!

05 Nov

There Are So Many Levels

There is always another mountain beyond the one you’ve just climbed and continually challenging yourself to be all that you can be is the best motivation for your personal evolution and growth. Honestly I think my best competition is trying to best myself at something I’ve achieved and I always enjoy the challenge. If I am unsuccessful at first I find it personally motivating to try that much harder again and again until I achieve my goal. While I recognize that I am stubborn, this trait has proven to be of great assistance because it helps keep me motivated to persevere even if something is more challenging than I had initially anticipated.

I do believe that the people we surround ourselves with in life can either help or hinder our efforts to progress.

If someone believes in you, do them the honor or letting them know their belief in you is not wasted, rise to all that you can be. One person can make a difference because on the flip side one person’s lack of belief can plant the seeds of self-doubt and that doubt can destroy not only your faith in yourself but your faith in them.

I don’t believe that we’ve chosen the people that enter our lives but rather it has been destined to evolve because that was the plan from the beginning, whether we realize it or not.

Everyone that crosses our path, negative or positive, are there to teach us how to determine who we want to walk with us through this life. All of it is a challenge, some challenges are more obvious than others and I think the ones that are the most obvious are our mistakes or missteps because they hurt and we tend to pay a lot more attention to them whether that is trying to dissect why something happened or trying to determine how to avoid it in the future.

It’s amazing how some of the most monumental developments in my life have evolved from humble beginnings, I mean I’ve literally fallen into great opportunities that have seemed so effortless that had I planned for it I would have expected to have to put more effort into it. I think that’s the beauty of the destined path especially if you are continually pushing yourself onto the next level of your life. If you are not open to embracing the challenge and the change you become stagnant and that state of being can deteriorate your spirit into so many negative and non-productive directions.

Everything in life is evolving whether you choose to evolve with or not and it’s your personal and life challenges that can either make or break how you far you end up going but these challenges build character and strength whether we desire it or not.

There is a lot of reference now to the “bucket list” which I think is a great motivator but only if you don’t take yourself for granted and have enough belief in yourself to know that you will work as hard as you can to do all the things you have on your list. The “bucket list” is similar to the vision board and whichever format works best to aide you is the one you should use. I use both actually, mostly because the more I see something the more ingrained it becomes in my mind and which makes manifestation inevitable. I must have a million different notepads that I’ve written goals in along with the pages I’ve written them on, torn out and carried around with me. My process works for me, I’ve done clean-ups where I’ve found these notepads or notes and discovered that everything on them was now a checkmark of success.

I know that these successes are the inspiration for my continued climb onto the next level because I want to challenge and push myself to the limits so I can be happily surprised when I achieve success. It is a joyful feeling to create and induce your personal confidence level when you achieve something that you didn’t know if you could but challenged yourself anyway because of the inner strength it builds.

You Are Enough!

29 Oct

Knowing Your Worth

Our value is very much attached and/or validated by our thoughts and our thoughts are fed through the Inner Dialogue of Self-Love and Self-Talk but that dialogue can be altered by outside influences during our weaker moments.

The weaker moments happen when you are feeling inferior, insecure or both and it causes you to question your self-worth in either one or all areas of your life but usually it’s only one area at a time. I’ve found that I’m fairly confident when it comes to my career/work related area and I think that’s because there isn’t a lot of emotion attached because while it is the hand that feeds me (so to speak) it’s not the one that keeps me breathing. My love (family & friends) is the area that keeps me breathing and feeds my inner spirit with all things that are beautifully and emotionally joyful and sometimes challenging. Of course anything connected to emotion has the power to elevate you or take you down and it’s usually when you’re down that you question your worth.

Self-Love:

You need to have enough self-love for yourself before you can offer your love to someone else and if you don’t trust yourself then how can you trust anyone else?

– When you are passionate about who you are you exude a light of warmth and contentment that doesn’t need any outside influence for validation and what you project draws others to you without effort.

– Trusting in a Faith you cannot see or touch are the seeds of Hope and it is through that Belief that the soul is nourished.

– Humility and Gratitude Always! Your Ego will constantly wrestle with you for control but it is these two states of being that give you the growth without changing who you authentically are.

Self-Talk:

What do you tell yourself about who you are and how others perceive you?

You shouldn’t have to prove anything to anyone for them to believe in you. If someone really cares about you they don’t need proof, they feel it and they honor that feeling by showing unconditional support through whatever context the relationship exists.

– You are a human soul with feelings and what you tell yourself should be just as honest and compassionate as it is with others.

– Don’t assume that someone is thinking negatively of you unless they’ve actually voiced it. Any assumptions I’ve ever made in that area have caused me to feel bad about myself needlessly.

– Regardless of what your past has been we all deserve forgiveness. You cannot change what was but you can create anew of what is to come. Regret can be a breeding ground for negative self-talk and does not serve any purpose except for allowing the Ego to gain control. It is through positive change going forward that regret is silenced.

I do believe that it is through our formative years that our true identity is created and the core of our being does not change but our formative years are the foundation and what grows around that foundation depends on who we aspire to become. Yes, circumstance and outside influences definitely affect that foundation but our formative years are from a very early age (0-5 years) and within that age category there isn’t a good or bad seed that is planted but rather exposed and we always have the free will to choose which direction we want to gravitate towards.

If you feel like your worth isn’t as strong as you’d like it to be, whether that is from the effects of the external stresses of existence or not I believe it is your Love (family & friends) that are the keys to reinforcing your strength. When others have drained you, whether that is by your own allowance or not, it is usually your family, friends or both that help you put the pieces of the puzzle back together. It’s not that you are broken but rather that you’ve forgotten just how special and important you are to those that love you and they are there to remind you of your worth.

We are all here to learn, to experience and to grow and even
though our challenges and life paths are different from one another, no one person’s light is more important.

2 Comments

Posted by shelleyhallmark on October 29, 2013 in Blog

Tags: believing in yourself, faith, inner dialogue, knowing your worth, no one is better than another, positive thinking, self-love, self-talk, self-worth, you are enough

When the Storm Ends

15 Oct

A New Beginning Opens Up

I can breathe again!

With the end of any challenging experience brings the opportunity for a new beginning and direction in life. We aren’t defined by the challenges themselves or if we make mistakes, we are defined by the changes we make as a result.

My recent challenges have finally levelled off and in the last couple of weeks I finally had the chance to exhale. My renewed sense of awareness, focus and direction are creating a sense of peace that feels like I am in a state of relaxation all day long. I don’t know if it is just that my mind and body have finally de-activated the “All Systems Alert” button or if the new beginning is the major cause but what I do know is that my new normal is feeling fabulous!

The Storm itself is meant to cause upheaval and depending on what your life lessons are and where you are on your path that upheaval could be either minor or major. If you are too far off your destined path the major storm can be quite stressful but the storms themselves open up opportunity for growth and transition that you may not have reached without it and hopefully the wisdom you gain is used to your best advantage. The storms should NEVER be wasted and what ALWAYS comes with them is the opportunity to change things to your liking, you always have a choice.

I’ve experienced both minor and major storms and “God willing” there aren’t many more of the major ones destined but honestly it feels like my latest one really cracked me open and as hard as it was to deal with I really like the end result.

Along with my new beginning came a greater appreciation for the parts of life I used to rush through, I used to get so stressed about making everything I had on my plate fit into my day whether it took up all of my “ME” time or not. I crammed as much as I could in my day in order to whittle down my ever-growing “to do” list but I was depriving myself of a much needed decompress time at the end of the day and I’ve been doing this for many months, maybe even a year. No wonder my new sense of peace and direction has me feeling like I’m in a state of relaxation all day long, it makes sense that unwinding from that much lack of self-preservation feels so cathartic.

There were so many benefits that I’ve been able to take away from all my experiences and digging for the deeper strength has been the hardest task but I definitely learned that no matter what if you have to go through something difficult, don’t do it alone! Regardless of how strong you may think you are, vulnerability is the key to finding the new path. It doesn’t mean you are weak, actually it is probably the moment you are most open because when you are vulnerable you don’t have the fight left to resist. Resistance is what prevents you from embracing change and during the storms is the time when the most change is needed.

If you are currently in a storm in your life (minor or major), neither are easy, keep reminding yourself that it will eventually pass and when it’s done there are many gifts on the other side waiting for you. Embrace them for all that they offer, stay open and mindful that you don’t resist. You have more inner strength than you probably realize and when you dig the deepest the biggest rewards will follow. The rewards may not look the way you had envisioned, they will likely be better and bring you a greater sense of peace, as they did with me.

Bring It On!

01 Oct

Facing the Challenge

Challenges not only define our character but they build it as well.

Who are you really? Are you someone that pushes the limits to achieve because you feel so strongly that it is your destined path? Or do you say to yourself “I’m not sure, I’ll sit back and wait” and then never try because it’s easier?

I am someone who pushes the limits, I like a challenge, I think for me that comes from being an athlete in competitive team sports. I don’t get as much athletic sport in as I used to, responsibilities are more in demand but competition has always been very inspiring and motivating for me. Chances are if you’ve ever taken part in any team sport “sitting back and waiting” isn’t a desired skill of any team player, you have to get in there and dig a little.

Although being a team player doesn’t necessarily mean that “pushing the limits” is carried out in your daily life as well, you may feel you’re not as confident alone as you are with the team. It all depends on you personally, what your goals and intentions are and how strongly you feel about what you want out of this life.

Recently I had to adapt to a difficult and challenging experience and I have to admit that while in the midst of it I did not feel very strong but now through it and out on the other side I’ve found that it has expanded my awareness and opened my beliefs to a higher level of appreciation. Every life experience, no matter the level of difficulty, is there to teach us something. We all go through experiences that ultimately are there to make us a better person and we have two choices. We can either recognize, learn and grow from them or we can ignore them and wallow in our dislike of the experiences.

Obviously the more challenging the experience the greater the demand is for inner strength to endure it and depending on the circumstances and how much support you have around you, it can affect how well you cope. Sometimes being alone can put you in the company of your worst enemy.

I’ve had conversations with others who have evoked the same emotion at that moment that they felt at the time when recalling something that made them sad. It’s amazing how the heart can hold onto an emotion for what seems like an eternity even well after a challenging transition has concluded. I think sometimes it can feel surprising that our emotion just sits there below the surface, dormant until something triggers it.

I feel that this recent experience was meant to break me open yet again to propel me onto a new path and eventually when I do take a glance back to see how far I’ve come I will be surprised, monumental change is ahead and it’s all positive!

My faith was challenged, as was my inner strength but now I say “Bring it On!”, I have the determination to not let my challenges or tests break or weaken me, I know they are meant to make me stronger. It all starts with taking that “leap of faith”; a real “leap of faith” means believing in something so fiercely that there is no possibility for any other outcome other than that which you believe in. That belief cannot be deterred by circumstance, delay or setbacks; it is ignited by signs and omens that insinuate and fan the flames of our imagination and intuition of that which we see in our mind’s eye and will come to be.

Remember, it’s not about what you take with you, it’s about what you build and authenticity is the most important character trait you can possess. Genuine, heartfelt emotional connections to others are the bread of life and it’s through those connections that we find who we are meant to be, what we are meant to do and where we are meant to go and ultimately who will be with us.

Those kindred spirits are the ones we are meant to connect with, the ones we travel through this life with and the ones we can’t do without. Build that life and only happiness can follow.

2 Comments

Posted by shelleyhallmark on October 1, 2013 in Blog

Tags: authentity, beliefs, destiny, determination, emotional connections, faith, focus, handling life's challenges, inner strength, kindred spirits

Trying to Find my Balance Again!

24 Sep

During a Time that Feels Wildly Unbalanced

The spectrum of emotions that has plagued my mind for the last month and a half has definitely taken its toll by making me feel completely unbalanced and out of sync.

As I wrote about in one of my recent posts “Very Challenging Time”, A my daughter’s Scoliosis journey presented detours that I hadn’t expected. Almost a month after her surgery she was finally released from the hospital and I felt positive about the road to recovery from there but what I hadn’t foreseen was that we would be back at the hospital 4 days later because one of the infections she had (unrelated to the surgery) had come raging back with a vengeance.

The time period that evolved when the doctors were trying to determine the source of her sickness was terrifying, to say the least, they covered everything and I mean everything! As a parent it is difficult to have to sit back and watch them work especially if your child is stressed by it, as I had said my daughter recently had Scoliosis surgery with rods and screws fused to her spine and only a month ago. I realize that they have to determine the source of her sickness but I have to admit it was extremely difficult to watch them push up and down her spine to see if she flinched anywhere. I’m thinking “of course it bothers and hurts her some, what would anyone expect after only a month given the significance of the surgery”, I kept asking them to call someone from that team of specialists because they all knew her case intimately but until they had determined that was the cause that wasn’t going to happen. As I said I realize they weren’t trying to hurt her and wanted to make sure they checked every avenue so they could get her the appropriate treatment but it was really difficult to watch and as I write this it makes me feel like I’m making this all about me but as a parent, their pain and discomfort feels 100 times yours. You could throw anything in my path and I can handle it but it’s amazing how anything to do with our children can bring us to our knees and provoke such a feeling of helplessness.

After 48 hours of constant testing, poking, prodding and only 1 ½ hours sleep for my daughter it was finally determined that one of previous infections had not been fully eliminated so course of treatment followed and after a few days she started to respond and get back to being herself and after another 8 days in the hospital she has been released again.

I’m trying to find my balance again but it’s difficult because I feel like the threat of this re-occurring is looming around me and I am hesitant to allow myself into the space of feeling confident that things are going to be Ok. The slightest instance of any symptom for pretty much anything out there keeps terrorizing my mind and I know that this is only possible because I am basically “running on empty”. As much as the first round scared me, the second round has completely drained me and severely challenged my inner strength and faith. I know it will come back but it may take me some time to trust it. I also know I’m lucky and blessed that her prognosis is positive but my mind won’t allow me to fully embrace that yet.

There are many parents out there with children that are sick and the source is unknown or the source is known and the outcome is not positive and I can’t even imagine what life must be like for them or how they manage to deal with it daily. I can only offer my sincerest compassion for the roller coaster ride I’m sure they are constantly on, as with everything (including health challenges) there are ups and down, good days and bad days. I can only hope and pray for those that are currently in the midst of these kinds of challenges that the good days fill their hearts with enough love to carry them through the bad ones.

As I always say “Everything happens for a reason” and one of my beliefs is that we don’t go through difficult challenges for no reason. There is a purpose, and I’ve always believed that we are put through difficulty to make us stronger for something that is to come in our future. Even though I know my difficulty at this time isn’t as difficult as others it makes me wonder what is ahead that requires me to develop as much strength as it’s taking me to get through this.

I have, am and always will be about “all things positive” and I know I will get back there but this dip at this time has set me back more than I could have ever imagined or predicted. The positive aspect of this experience is that it has increased my understanding, empathy and admiration for those that power through these difficult experiences with great integrity and strength of character.

All Good Things in the Right Time!

31 Aug

Allowing the Universe to Set the Pace

I have my beliefs that I follow, one of them is having faith that things work out as they should and when they should, fighting or resisting the natural flow is pointless and usually very frustrating so it’s better for me to do what I need to do and allow the Universe to respond and set the pace.

I have many life goals that I want to achieve, all of which I have initiated and the most important aspect that I have to remain true to, is faith that the Universe will present the right opportunities when the time is perfectly right and not to try to force anything ahead of what is already divinely arranged.

The Universe provides us all with what we need but knows when the time is right and when we are most open to receive, accept and embrace. I think there are definitely times when we don’t realize that we aren’t fully open and could be blocking ourselves in some way that isn’t easily recognizable for us so that we could change it. I know that there have been a few times where I’ve thought “I’m ready” but things aren’t happening the way I’d hoped or when I’d hoped. What I’ve realized much later is even though I thought was ready, it turns out I wasn’t, I just thought I was and thought I knew better but that was the ego thinking (EGO: Edging God Out – as in removing faith in what you cannot see)

I’m not over the top in my beliefs and everyone has their own right to choose, I’ve learned what works for me and what doesn’t and I have adjusted and lived my life accordingly. Everyone should have the right to choose their own path and not be forced or coerced down one that doesn’t fully feel right or aligned with their inner core. As much as I’d like to at times help or direct someone I care about down a path that I feel is best for them it is not my place to do so and I don’t walk in their shoes every day so I am not aware of all that occurs within, nor do I have the right to judge which path they choose, that is the beauty of “free will”. Live and let live, I know I don’t like being told how I should be doing things so why should I expect that anyone else would. I am always open and appreciative to hear the opinion and/or advice of others I respect and admire but the final decisions are ultimately mine to make.

Our ego can get the better of us at times because it inflates and infuses our thoughts into an over-exaggerated belief of self-prominence and knowledge. What I’ve usually discovered later down the road in hindsight is usually very humbling and expands my awareness to a greater degree.

I believe the best course of action is to lay the groundwork, let the Universe respond when the time is right and be open to waiting for it and taking advantage of the opportunity when it presents itself, you will “feel it” when the opportunity is right, do not hesitate, seize the moment. Trusting and believing that things will happen as they should and when they should is the key to enhancing your patience. If something doesn’t go the way you’d hoped it usually takes you into a newer and better direction, one that turns out to be a better plan that maybe you never had thought of or considered. Every single time I have maintained my belief and faith I have been rewarded with more opportunities than I could have imagined and that is enough of an indication for me to stay on the same track because it works great! I don’t need to push the boundaries because things always tend to even out in the end so putting myself through additional stress trying to push or force something to happen is pointless.

Like I said earlier I have many life goals that I’ve initiated, I have many hopeful desires for life direction that I will continue to focus my strongest thoughts on and I will do all that I need to achieve them but without force because the Universe will present the opportunities and if it isn’t what I’d hoped for, I know it will be something better, experience has taught me that lesson.

Remember your thoughts (positive or negative) are just as strong an influence on the direction your life goes as anything in your life and what you most think about will show up in your life so be very aware of what thoughts you have in both your conscious and sub-conscious mind. In my opinion it is the sub-conscious mind that has the most power (the sub-conscious runs continually), you can say to yourself consciously that you wish and desire things one way but if you feel deep down (sub-consciously) that your thoughts really don’t fully believe than you could be your own downfall.

As an example to illustrate this theory, I myself utilize this same thought process but I also read it as an excerpt from one of the contributing writers in the book “The Secret”. A woman spoke of having issues with her weight her whole life and when she started to utilize the theories in the “The Secret” that changed. Her sub-conscious thoughts used to fully support her reasoning for having difficulty with controlling her weight, how she couldn’t lose it no matter how many different diets she tried or how much exercise she did.

In case you aren’t seeing what the common denominator is here she kept reinforcing negative thoughts that backed up why she couldn’t shed the unwanted pounds:

– I tried exercise but can’t lose any weight

– Everything I eat goes to my waist

– I’ve tried all diets and nothing keeps it off

All of her inner responses and sub-conscious thoughts were reinforcing and allowing the negative to keep operating against her with excuses as to why it wasn’t working, making it ok to fail and justifying it.

It really does all begin with changing your thoughts as to where you can progress to and having faith that things will go in the direction you want. So she changed her thoughts and reinforced them with positive ones

– Exercise is taking off the excess I want to discard

– Nothing is going to stick to me

– This new diet of moderation with occasional reward is working

By the end of the story the woman had said she was down to her goal weight and maintaining it because of this change of thought process and that was within not only the conscious but sub-conscious mind. You need to have both on board to be able to effect the change you want to see.

The same enhancement of thought goes for everything in your life including your faith and state of being and even though I’ve had my moments of doubt (which I believe everyone has at one time or another, it’s only natural and human), but bringing myself back to center and positive thinking will bring a much more relaxed state of happiness and healthy living.

– Be Aware

– Be Open

– Be Gracious

– Be Humble

The Universe will give you what you need when you live in these states of being. Always remember that things could be so much worse and that breath of life is a gift that shouldn’t go unappreciated.

2 Comments

Posted by shelleyhallmark on August 31, 2013 in Blog

Tags: changing your thoughts, conscious mind, ego, everything happens when it should, faith, free will, gratitude, opportunities, positive thinking, subconscious mind, trust, universal wisdom

Things I’ve Learned So Far

07 Aug

And; Where they’ve taken me

The ONLY disability in life is a bad attitude!

I Give Up, it’s too hard! Have you ever said or thought this? The biggest downside to this thought is that you will get what you give out in this situation. If you’re feeling like your life isn’t going in the direction you want it to, it’s up to YOU to change directions. If you got lost in a forest would you:

– Wait and hope that someone finds you

– Or keep trying to find your way out

I won’t say I’ve never allowed my attitude to get out of balance, honestly I don’t think it’s gone entirely in the bad attitude direction but I’ve teetered on the edge and have usually found that the energy associated with it just doesn’t fit for me. It makes me feel like I have the flu and I fight hard to rid myself of it.

I believe it’s human to experience all spectrums of emotion, it becomes difficult when we sit too long in the negative ones which gives them the chance to take root, fester and grow.

Sometimes I overthink things.

I’ve done this A LOT! Having a visual mind can work great wonders for you but with the wrong sense behind it, like fear, it can lead you to a whole lot of anxiety. This has been recent for me:

In the last 4 months I’ve learned that my 14 year old daughter has to have surgery for Scoliosis and with fear in my very visual mind it took me through a lot of bad thought processes. One of the reasons I went through those areas is because she’s my child, my baby and always will be but also because she was born at 6 months and weighed (1lb, 7 ounces) which is really premature and right from the very beginning I had to relinquish my protective mothering rights to doctors who could help her to survive such an early arrival. Needless to say it was not easy to watch them poke and prod and even though I knew they were doing everything they could to help her it’s hard to be so helpless when as a mother your main job is to protect. So now she has to endure yet another big milestone in her life and what I’ve realized is that even though the milestones may look different for each family they usually involve some form of letting go. I have to let go of the fear and allow the positive strength I know we both have to guide us through it and I know we will come out on the other side more strongly bonded then we were before.

Strength in Self is Paramount.

Is your spirit so broken that you can’t find a way out of the disappointment? I think if you believe that to be true of yourself, you absolutely must change that thought and get it working for you instead of working against you. Your strength in self in all situations and specifically your inner dialogue can either impede your growth or encourage it.

Pastor Rick Warren says about painful experiences that “God never wastes a hurt”.

All experiences, good or bad ultimately teach us something and our gratitude towards these experiences can either diminish our light or ignite it. If you feel like negativity is pulling you down, neutralize it by surrounding yourself with those that inspire you and lift you up.

Leader or a follower?

I prefer to direct and lead my own path but I will follow a good leader. If I follow someone and they lead me down the wrong path is it their fault for leading me there? Or is my fault for following? In my opinion it is neither, because I made the choice to follow for a reason, somewhere it served a greater purpose for me and even though I may not realize what has driven me in that direction yet it will all come to light at the right time.

Everything happens for a Reason!

Faith!

Self-explanatory really, you’ve got to have faith if you ever hope to achieve your greatest desires. Having faith helps you to develop greater clarity and love in your sense of self as well as personal development. Sometimes we start out on our path believing what we envision as our greatest desires only to discover later that they weren’t what we thought at all and are led, through faith, to an even better outcome than could possibly be imagined. So far my life has taken me in and through experiences that have challenged me and have given me a greater clarity in life than I ever realized was possible. There is NOTHING that cannot be changed or achieved by believing in yourself and in my opinion the only time it’s too late is when you are no longer in the physical world!

Don’t disable yourself in life, believe you can do anything and you will!

6 Comments

Posted by shelleyhallmark on August 7, 2013 in Blog

Tags: attitude, believe in yourself, everything happens for a reason, faith, inner strength, it's never too late, things I've learned

Enhancing Your Thoughts

24 Jul

By Building a Positive Outlook

I don’t know if what I’m feeling is associated with astrology, as in planetary alignment, or if it is just me but I feel like I have been recharged. I think the ability to enhance ourselves even more positively than we may currently be feeling is something that ultimately comes from within but can be enhanced externally as well. It’s the equivalent of starting off your day feeling great and having external occurrences, like green lights all the way to work, support and/or enhance it. I do find that when I’ve felt the uprise of positivity there is no downslide it just keeps building and building and I think that has a lot to do with my thoughts and how strongly I embrace them.

I know that not every day of our lives is totally fabulous or flawless, of course that would be great wouldn’t it? I do aspire to make every day a good one and my positive mindset is one of my most helpful assets but I do have my off days and thankfully they are few. There are times when things aren’t necessarily off but maybe more stagnant and those days can be as frustrating as the off days especially if you have a lot of ambition and hope for where you want to see your life go.

I think it’s in those times where we aren’t really experiencing a storm but rather frustration that I believe are the indications that you are in need of some rest, relaxation and recharge. Sometimes the ambition can deplete you, especially if your expectations for the speed of your own personal progress isn’t moving ahead in the timeframe you had hoped for. An important thing to remember is that your faith is being challenged, another one of life’s lessons that has presented itself to me many times and when I realize I need to let go and trust that the universe knows much more than I do things start to even out because I know that everything will happen when the time is perfectly right.

What we create in our lives is solely influenced by our thoughts, state of mind and actions. I’ve witnessed someone who has embellished the truth significantly and after telling that same story it begins to take on more of a life itself then it started out with, after a while the story teller has told this story so many times that they start to believe every single part of it and it becomes their truth. Imagine if you try this same process but with a positive change that you want to create, so let’s say with ourselves, most of us have an issue with some area of our own self-image and when I read the book “The Secret” this exercise was in there too. I do believe that we can change ourselves in any area with thoughts simply by seeing a minimal change and empowering it positively, like the story teller that embellished the truth, you start to believe you are seeing the change and it grows from there and becomes your truth, honestly I’ve tried this myself and it has worked. Our mind and thoughts can do greater things than we realize. It doesn’t mean you do nothing and expect change but you do have to make adjustments to encourage what you hope to see change and starting out small is the best way to see progress.

You definitely NEED to be the change you want to see and when things begin to go in that direction, embrace it and encourage it wholeheartedly.

The decision, determination and drive to embrace and keep the positive rolling and on the right track is fully in your control.

The positive state of being can move mountains and can reduce difficulty that may have previously blocked your way. Sometimes a good dose of positive enlightenment can help to put things into perspective. Obviously you aren’t actually going to physically see a mountain move but how we perceive blockage in our life can be altered simply by recognizing that there are situations that could be and are much worse than what we believe as hindering our lives. What we encourage and embrace as our fate or luck is what will continue to occur in our daily lives until we make that shift into the positive state of being. Why would anyone embrace or accept the things they don’t want to see continue in their lives? There are many self-deprecating reasons we choose to but none of them are really true or what we deserve, we just think we do and that’s what keeps up in that state.

When you have even one little moment, one smidgen of positivity occur, grab on with all you’ve got and don’t let go. It will be your wisest and best decision and like any state of being it can spiral. I don’t know about you but if something is going to spiral out of control, I want it to be the positive!

1 Comment

Posted by shelleyhallmark on July 24, 2013 in Blog

Tags: changing your life for the better, changing your thoughts, embracing the positive, faith, positive thoughts, trusting the universe

Take Control of Your Power!

15 May

Your Strength Lies Within

Everyone has the potential to be great and what you feed into (positive or negative) weighs heavily on what the outcome may be. When you don’t reach that greatness it doesn’t mean you don’t deserve it or it’s not part of your destiny. It could be that you are feeding into the possibility that “you can’t” succeed rather than “you can” and that mindset is something we can build ourselves through fear and insecurity. Fear can seem overwhelming because in our minds we’ve built it up that big, but we have the ability within us to change that obstacle from a mountain to a mole hill, it’s all perception.

“A change of feeling is a change of destiny” – Neville

I believe that a large part of “taking control of your power” is found within being vulnerable, even though that vulnerability feels scary, it’s ultimately empowering. The reason it’s empowering is because it takes a great deal of courage to embrace vulnerability and allow the chips to fall where they may. Being vulnerable helps you discover that you innately have a reserve of strength to draw from that you didn’t know was there and that experience is not only empowering but also humbling. We don’t always give ourselves the credit we deserve when it comes to our own personal power. It’s hard enough when another person is discouraging by not believing in you but when you also do not believe in yourself you begin to limit your life opportunities and options and that’s just not right.

My personal inner voice and reaction to anything fear based and negative is that “I am not going to let it conquer or defeat me”, I will persevere, backing out is not an option!

My positive mind says “No Way is fear going to be allowed to win. Turn around and go back where you came from, you have no business here!”

Negative thoughts like fear or failure don’t stand a chance when you affirm with yourself and the universe that you’re strong and you’re not giving up. Things only occur because we acknowledge their presence in our existence, everything start with a thought. Don’t think negatively and negative things will not occur.

By following Neville’s Law of Assumption you can increase your success in any or all areas of your life that you want to improve:

“If this assumption is persisted in until it becomes your dominant feeling, the attainment of your ideal is inevitable”

Once you’ve accepted yourself for who you are, others will also accept you for who you are. When you begin to accept and believe in yourself you won’t put as much emphasis on needing to feel accepted by others and that ease of contentment and peace is a quality that others will gravitate toward and relate to.

I always love hearing a good line from a movie and my most recent that I want to share with you is one that I thought was very inspiring and something we should all aspire to, it’s similar to my own thoughts about having faith in humanity. The more people believe in others, the more others will rise to the occasion.

“I like to think that if you put your trust out there, I mean if you really give people the benefit of the doubt, see their best intentions that they’re going to want to live up to it. It doesn’t always work out but more often than not I think that if you do, people will rise to the occasion. I really do believe that!”

3 Comments

Posted by shelleyhallmark on May 15, 2013 in Blog

Tags: "I can succeed", acceptance, believe in yourself, believing in others, courage, facing your fears, faith, greatness, positive thinking, rise to the occasion, self-empowerment, strength, vulnerability

Shelley Hallmark

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