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Follow Your Instincts!

11 Jun

Let Your Inner Wisdom have a Voice

There is so much going on in our lives and around us that we don’t have the time or the opportunity to hear what our internal voice or instinct has to say, believe me I know this one! My life for the past year has been drama after drama after drama and I’ve not given my own spirit as many moments as it deserves to recharge, rebuild or revive my inspiration. As much as I want to encourage others to give themselves that time I have to also push myself to embrace it more because it is what makes our souls flourish. Every moment you can give yourself counts!

Everyone has an opinion and most are willing to share it whether you want it or not. Everyone has a direction they feel you should be going in and are most convincing in telling you how you should be living your life but the real question is, what do your instincts have to say? Why are you paying so much attention to what others think you should be doing, why are you not consulting your own inner voice and conscience?

I think we all spend too much time in consideration of what others will think about what we are doing rather than giving consideration to the voice that matters the most, the one inside you that instinctively knows what the best direction for you actually is. The only time I have not allowed my inner voice to have the floor is when I know that a direction or action I’ve taken is or feels wrong. I think we tend to avoid even our own conscience when we know we’ve blurred our line of integrity.I choose

That action itself can have a spiral effect that you may not realize because when you take an action that isn’t even approved by your own conscience a shift in your mind of what you deserve as a result occurs and actions that follow may be against you by you because you are going to deal yourself the punishment. How long will that last though and how do you know when you’ve suffered enough to lighten up on yourself? All of this second guessing and punishment seems almost crazy, if you just consult your conscience from the beginning and listen to your instincts chances are you won’t have to end up in this crazy spiral.

We are here in human bodies and that humanity at times is flawed, sometimes we make mistakes but sometimes those mistakes lead us to a better place in our life by bringing inner wisdom, personal growth and awareness to our soul. Self-punishing is pointless, taking ownership and making amends rejuvenates and revives the soul in ways that self-punishing never will.

With so much going on outside of us it’s easy to get caught up in the daily buzz, next thing you know a week has gone by, and then a month, and so forth and you still haven’t given yourself that time-out to listen to what’s inside your spirit. Taking that time out to stop and smell the roses has so much more meaning than you realize and honestly at certain times in our lives it doesn’t feel possible but somewhere within the 24 hours of a day you need to honor your spirit enough to give it even just a moment to speak to you.

I don’t think many of us realize how much easier life could be if we allowed our spirit to have a voice for even just a moment, it knows your best direction better than you think you do and sometimes when you go against it you are creating more difficulty in your life than if you just went with your natural flow.

There is a mountain of distractions that can easily keep us from hearing the wisdom our inner voice has to offer but those distractions also keep us in a daily routine and life that isn’t productive or pleasurable. It’s easy to put your time and interest into someone else’s life because you either feel that’s your purpose or because it feels fulfilling but I believe that will only last for a while because your instincts know you are supposed to be somewhere else in your life and will keep trying to guide you there, why are you resisting? By this I don’t mean abandon those you feel are connected to your purpose, more like find the balance so everyone’s spirit is equally nurtured.

We are hard-wired to survive but instinctually we are driven to find the greater meaning and connection to our path and each other, intellectually we know that connection cannot occur alone so we need each other. It is what goes on externally that can either impede or inspire your progression on your path, navigating it by utilizing your instincts is not only the key but your saving grace.

Have you ever had the notion that there is something that you should be doing, somewhere else you should be, some destiny or prophecy that you should be fulfilling, something bigger than you that is significant in a way you aren’t yet aware of?

I think that is your instinct trying to put the yearning into your soul so you strive to seek the greater purpose that each of us have and are meant for. Our purposes are different from one another, some are interconnected, some are not but all are a part of the Universal Grand Design that is part of this journey.intuition, albert einstein

I believe we have all embarked on these seemingly separate journeys to develop a deeper connection to our souls, then each other and the Universe, when you come across that “aha” moment of making that connection it’s an amazing epiphany that you will finally realize could not have been stumbled upon any other way than spiritually.

Don’t forget your Gift!

 
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Posted by on June 11, 2014 in Blog

 

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The Seeds of Greatness!

28 May

Are at the Core of your Spirit

Peeling back the layers of life that have caused your spirit to be cloaked by any negative emotion as a result of your experiences is what allows your true essence to shine!

Where was I Then?

Your youth is where it all begins, where patterns, habits and learned behaviours are formed. You are meant to learn and grow from your experiences not be crippled by them. If your environment doesn’t contain any sort of positive aspects then your outlook of possibilities may be diminished. Your role models are the biggest influences in creating your view on the world, how they model their ability to deal with life experiences is very influential and will either be motivational or damaging. Some behaviours pass through more than one generation and are viewed as “normal” because that is all you know, especially when you are young. It is only when you start to develop into your own independence that you become aware of the inconsistencies. Most times you seek out those that fit the same behavioural pattern that is so familiar and I think eventually you either break away from it or fall into the same mold because it is too far outside of your comfort zone.

I think the biggest and most crippling aspect of this is that you can end up going through many life experiences without really experiencing them because the pattern is so ingrained that you run on auto-pilot and never realize that there is more to your life than just the day to day run of existence.

Where am I Now?

Asking yourself the big questions that are beginning to resonate in your soul are both important and necessary. If it matters to you, it matters! If you’re feeling like there’s something more that you want to reach for or experience within your life there is never a time when it is too late. All change or transformation begins with a first step – the decision. The decision, which doesn’t sound like a huge step, actually is but following through is even bigger. Once you’ve taken those very critical two first steps you start to fall back in alignment with the Universe (I call it being in the Zone, athletes will totally know what I mean) and the Universe only works to create what is meant for you.

Believe me, we are all meant to experience life positively, it is when we fall out of alignment that things start to go sideways.

Where will I Go?dr suess quote #3

Once you’ve taken on a more positive outlook and continue to search or have found your new path the places you can go become infinite possibilities! Listen to Dr. Suess, it’s not just meant for children!

I strive to inspire, motivate and cultivate all things positive and continue to seek deeper awareness and understanding. Every day I learn, every day I come across new meaning to parts of life I didn’t realize existed and every day I am enlightened, humbled and impressed!

Don’t let negative life experiences prevent you from living the life you are meant for or deserve. Make the decision that “it stops here!” and immediately change direction, you can do anything you set your mind to!

At your core you’re all things pure and good and when you realize the amount of strength you and all of us have been given, success and happiness is just a short period of time away and all it takes for you to get there from here is your decision to do it.

Make the change that changes your life!

 
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Posted by on May 28, 2014 in Blog

 

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R.E.S.P.E.C.T.

21 May

What it All Means to Me!

respectThis word or as I see it, “state of grace”, seems to come so easy to some but yet can be so difficult for others, anyone living without respect is depriving themselves of all the gifts that come with it.

I grabbed this definition from the internet and there were many but I think this one encompasses the aspects that are a little blurred in society today.

Respect:

It means valuing each other’s points of views. It means being open to being wrong. It means accepting people as they are. It means not dumping on someone because you’re having a bad day. It means being polite and kind always, because being kind to people is not negotiable. It means not dissing people because they’re different to you. It means not gossiping about people or spreading lies.

Respect is basic, the unwritten golden rule, and it’s not just about respecting others, there is respect for yourself, life, animals, earth, the environment and many more. When you have basic respect it flows effortlessly into everything you do, it feeds all self-nurturing aspects in yourself and others, like self-worth, pride of accomplishment and a job well done, not just done!

Respect lies within every experience and when you live and breathe it daily in your life so much wisdom and personal rewards will be gained.

What it All Means to Me:

We teach others how to treat us and what we are willing to accept and I haven’t been the greatest at standing my ground when I know I feel lessened and/or weakened in spirit by another. In the past I have allowed others to lower the level of respect I deserve because I felt I was being disrespectful or mean if I said otherwise.

I do find that as I learn to further embrace my strength my direction in life becomes more defined and the vision ahead takes a different but stronger and better focused shape.

Respect is the cornerstone to all aspects of life, it goes hand in hand with our personal integrity, it is the foundation of all successful relationships and when coupled with gratitude respect and many other states of being are enhanced. If you have gratitude/appreciation for where you are now and the blessings you’ve had in your life you won’t experience as much resistance on your path. Whenever I’ve questioned the Universe as to why a circumstance is so challenging I come across someone who is experiencing it at a deeper level and I am immediately humbled.

The Universe speaks to you through your inner spirit, your gut instinct to help guide you to the path you are meant to walk and it is always to your benefit to listen.

When you allow your inner spirit and voice to be heard you give yourself the opportunity to share and bond with the Universe and those in it as you were meant to and when you tune into that alignment magical things happen!

respect, magnificent world

 
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Posted by on May 21, 2014 in Blog

 

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The Reward is the Warmth in Your Heart

14 May

Expectations Have No Place!

The “Give and Take” in every relationship should be one of equality on at least one level but hopefully more. The act of giving should always be with an open heart and without expectation but when the act of taking becomes overwhelming perhaps it’s time to revisit the foundation of the relationship to avoid developing the negative emotion of resentment.

An expectation is like broken trust or loyalty, it is corrosive, it does damage in ways you don’t even realize. An expectation can hold on well after a relationship has dissolved and develop into stumbling blocks or red flags during the period of time when new relationships begin to form. You may not realize it but when you are holding onto something from your past and are unwilling to change your story it deters people from wanting to be in your company and the only person that hurts is you.

Everyone always says “it’s the little things that count” and that is so true but if you attach an expectation to even the little things it’s diminishes its value greatly.

Respect, gratitude and graciousness towards others shouldn’t be compromised to serve only one and there is more reward, warmth in your heart, when the intention comes from a place of purity. No action taken for the purpose of manipulation, lies or self-serving behaviour comes from a positive place. Intention is everything and if it is anything less than unconditional then the intention that may have started out from a pure thought changes negatively. Be very aware of your intentions and actions because they speak much louder than any words can ever say and hurt at a far deeper level than anyone is usually willing to admit.

Sometimes you can unknowingly carry expectations into current or new relationships because a past issue that caused you emotional hurt is unresolved. Emotions are finicky and unpredictable and no matter how well you may think you’ve managed to control them they have a tendency to find a way back out and usually at the worst time!

I think the biggest indication to knowing you have truly moved past something is when you no longer feel any animosity or concern. Letting go is the act of releasing something you cannot change or control and allowing it to be. This is a good thing because if something is holding you back and preventing you from enjoying or embracing your life the way you deserve to than it was obviously something that didn’t belong on your path.

Trust that the universe is working for you, not against you and know that everyone that comes into your life and every experience happens for a reason. We are all an intricate and necessary part of the human existence and each of us will have an impact on at least one person if not more, I think it is best to make that impact be positive.

I heard this phrase recently, can’t remember where from but it went something like this:

“A man can accomplish anything when he realizes he’s a part of something bigger”

Think of the Universe as a huge puzzle and each one of us is a piece of it, even one of us gone causes the puzzle to be incomplete. So along that line, then what about when people pass on or new babies are born? I think the puzzle is constantly changing to adapt, encompass and embrace those changes but it doesn’t change the importance of any one of us, we are all relevant.

Once you give up your expectations, you will never be disappointed again! It’s as easy as changing your intention which immediately changes your direction and your attitude.

You can have everything you want in life if you stay focused!

expectations quote

 
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Posted by on May 14, 2014 in Blog

 

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Define Yourself!

07 May

Who Do You Think You Are?

You can’t go back, you can only move forward so the question is are you going to let your past define your future or let your future defy your past?

Neville’s Law of Assumption:

If this assumption is persisted in until it becomes your dominant feeling, the attainment of your ideal is inevitable.

This is one of my favorites from Neville and when this really sinks in it gives you the beauty of connecting with an understanding that is not only enlightening but empowering. Think on this for a moment and really absorb the level of consciousness that is being shared with this simple phrase and imagine how much you put into every thought that defines not only you but your actions on a daily basis.building the new

If you have a low opinion of yourself the energy you may be projecting towards others can come across in many different ways, usually none of them are productive or complimentary and that causes others to feel either dislike or indifferent toward you. Chances are if you are experiencing your life this way you aren’t happy about how your relationships or daily interactions transpire.   Most often when it is our own personal behaviour patterns in question it’s sometimes hard to pinpoint where positive change would be of benefit but my own experiences and observations have taught me that a stumbling block in the past is almost always where you will find the moment you got off course. It may seem surprising how little it takes to change or significantly alter your path onto one that not only inhibits your growth but prevents you from living the blessed life we are all meant for.

If you have a healthy opinion of yourself than the energy you project is much more balanced and you likely don’t require any sort of personal approval from others to determine your self-worth. People will be drawn to your candid, contented, happy aura and positive presence. Healthy for me includes humor and a good dose of it at even my own expense which can not only alleviate stress but helps to keep the ego in check.

It would be great if everyone could just be themselves and be comfortable and confident with it. We are all unique individuals and each of us have something to offer this world but if your true self and soul is blanketed by a negative definition of who you believe you are than you are depriving the world of getting to know you, the real you.

Imagine if you really embraced this enough so that your dominant feeling becomes one of positive self-image, it’s worth a try isn’t it? Especially if the outcome is that the attainment of your ideal becomes inevitable.

Our thoughts are much more powerful than I think we often realize and through our thoughts we can either impede or cultivate what we desire. Regardless of whether it’s tough love or not, there is a big difference between positive encouragement, constructive criticism and full-on discouragement and that difference can either impede or cultivate what we desire.

It doesn’t matter what others think, it matters what you think and if what you believe about yourself is in alignment with your standard of integrity. The line of integrity you should never cross is your own and we know when we are at the edge, it’s that feeling that tugs at your conscience and encourages you to do right, not wrong.

If your daily life is positively inspired by and through Neville’s Law of Assumption I don’t believe you will ever go in a wrong direction because it is fed from a place of positive and unconditional light.

a change of feeling, a change of destiny

 
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Posted by on May 7, 2014 in Blog

 

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Sometimes You Have to Travel a Long Road

30 Apr

To Go a Short Distance!

It doesn’t matter what others do, it matters what you do!

Every occurrence, circumstance or event happens for a reason and usually that reason is connected to our own higher learning. I’ve thought in the past that when someone treated me in a way that was either manipulative, disrespectful or both that they deserved eternal condemnation but that’s not for me to decide. The Universe will handle it appropriately and in the right time, I need to trust in that, step back and draw some better boundaries to ensure it doesn’t happen again. We teach others how to treat us and honestly I’ve been a little too lax in my teachings in the past. I’ve often thought that the way I treated someone would be teaching enough as to how I also wanted to be treated but their intention in life may not be in alignment with mine. Learning how to decipher their intention and find only those that are in alignment with my intention is the lesson I am still fine-tuning.

I’ve always been someone that is super motivated to get to the next level so I can find out what the level after that is and so forth. I’ve come across people who live in a negative energy but have learned how to display passion that they also want to get to the next level but the truth of it is that if they wanted to get to the next level they would be doing something, anything, to be trying to get there and the lack that seems to be stalling them in place is really their own will or desire. The issue for them is that they have become content, familiar and/or addicted to their story because it serves as a great example/reason for the obstacles that prevent them from moving forward. The problem that will continue to plague them is that they are living in a negative mindset or point of view and that prevents the Universe from bringing the positive light in so the life that they secretly hope for but believe they don’t deserve can manifest.

live your truth

Imagine if you were meant for great things, which I believe we all are, we aren’t here to suffer, we are here to build and grow our souls so they can flourish but that can’t happen if a wall of negativity is blocking it from getting through. The biggest hurdle to letting all the good things get in is tearing down that wall and embracing that which makes you feel vulnerable or scared. Every time a monumental moment occurs hesitation is always there and rightly so, all monumental moments are the cusp of some impending change that will likely alter you in every area of life, which is why they are so scary and why we hesitate. Taking a leap of faith into unknown and unfamiliar territory is unnerving to say the least but every time I’ve ever done it I’ve never been disappointed, not even once! Even if it hasn’t led me to where I thought I was going, it has led me to something better.

It may seem easier, less scary, to keep yourself safely behind the protective armor of a negative mindset because at least you’re familiar with it, no one can hurt you there because you are already in defensive/protective mode but no good can get in either. So what you block out that hurts also prevents that which is good from getting through, I ask you, what’s more hurtful?

Even though the bad stuff feels rough, hurts and sometimes feels too overwhelming to overcome, it still comes with its gifts. That which does not kill me, only makes me stronger!

The more of the tough experiences you go through the stronger you get, the more resilient you get, the more capable you are of reaching for what you want and succeeding and when you combine that with embracing all things positive you more than double the power you’ve already gained from your experiences.

Sometimes you have to travel a long road to go a short distance. Imagine what you can do when you realize how powerful you already are!

Affirmations-Will-Manifest-Your-Dreams

 
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Posted by on April 30, 2014 in Blog

 

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When You Know Better, You Do Better

23 Apr

Strengthening the Ground You Stand On!

This eye-opening phrase comes from Maya Angelou and I first heard it when watching an Oprah Winfrey show a few years ago and even though at the time I thought I understood the meaning it turns out it didn’t fully sink in until recently when watching one of Oprah’s Lifeclass segments where she really dug into it.

Even though all of her shows, master classes and now lifeclasses focus on life enrichment and enlightenment for the betterment of our inner spirits I have always found it amazing that she could interview anyone and I mean anyone, including those that have been negatively labelled by society. How does she do it without reservation or judgement with regard to the actions that have brought the negative labels attached to them? A lot of times we can end up judging another person based on what we’ve heard or seen of their actions but who are we to judge? I’m quite sure that no one is perfect, everyone has made a mistake at one time or another.

I have chastised myself for the times I’ve allowed others to take advantage of an aspect of my personality and what I finally got from this phrase was while it was not nice for someone to take advantage they were able to do so because I let them, now I know better. I can’t continually punish myself for the actions of someone else because I was hurt by it, all I can do is learn from it and strengthen my boundaries so it doesn’t happen again “When you know better, you do better”.

awakening

What an “aha” moment it was when I finally got this in its full context and along with it came the enlightenment that if someone hurt me in my past I can’t continue to judge them for it now or carry it into my future because I allowed it, I let it happen. I didn’t knowingly consent to it but I also didn’t object, I didn’t communicate my discontent and that’s on me. Just maybe, they didn’t know better or maybe they did but that doesn’t matter because all actions have karmic consequences doled out only by the Universe and if someone knowingly and/or willingly takes advantage of another it is not my karma, it is theirs.

Negative experiences usually cause internal emotional hurt and/or pain and we all deal with these kinds of experiences differently. Some act out aggressively to release it, some internalize and act out passive aggressively and some bottle it up. The best way to heal is to acknowledge the hurt, allow yourself to feel it so you can make peace with it, learn from it and only then can you truly move forward and release it.

Negative experiences can sometimes stall you in life and paralyze you from moving forward, keeping you in that time to remember it over and over again. Knowing and doing better because of it frees you.

I’ve made my own mistakes, I learned from most of them, sometimes I had to make them twice to learn but “when you know better, you do better”. I certainly don’t make the same mistakes anymore because now I know better and what I’ve now learned to consider is that maybe those who have caused me hurt in the past were acting out of their own pain. Embracing this philosophy has given me a heightened sense of awareness into myself and others and has shown me another level of the “judgement” lesson, I don’t think any of us ever have it all figured out. This “aha” realization has taught me the deeper meaning of empathy and its connection to all of our emotional challenges but in this case specifically judgement, which has allowed me to further my trust that the Universe takes care of us all in relation to the life we live and the seeds we sow.

when-you-know-better-you-do-better

 
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Posted by on April 23, 2014 in Blog

 

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Intentionally on Purpose!

16 Apr

When the Actions Don’t Match the Words

Are your daily steps in alignment with the future you envision to live? It’s not just a matter of thinking or saying it out loud your actions must also be in alignment with that direction.

You don’t get in life what you want, you get what you prepare for!

If you wanted to be a doctor you would take the steps needed to head in that direction, get the schooling required, every step of that process would lead you to that profession, all of these actions are in alignment with the vision.

–        Are you actually living the life you really want right now?

–        If not, are you doing anything to get to that life?

When the actions don’t match the words, believe the actions!mistakes,fear

I think a lot of times difficulties and obstacles can lead you to believe you aren’t meant for this or it’s not your path but I disagree.

Difficulties and obstacles are your personal challenge to either quit or forge ahead and the question is which do you choose to do?

If what you seek truly means that much to you then the answer to that question should be quite easy. Maybe the difficulty or obstacle is there to create personal strength, strength you will need in your envisioned goal. Or maybe it is there to help build another aspect of your personality, an aspect that will enhance your success in the envisioned goal or further beyond that. I think giving up because you are afraid of failing, because you feel it’s too hard or because you aren’t confident of how things will turn out will create an emotional result that is much worse.

–        Regret is there to haunt you because you gave in to the fear.

–        Failure is there to remind you that you had the courage to try.

Anything is possible for anyone at any time but nothing will ever happen if you never take the chance.

I don’t fully believe that anything unsuccessful is failure because the experience may direct you to another path, one that you wouldn’t have discovered without first attempting the unsuccessful path. Some of the most brilliant discoveries were by accident while attempting to do something else, sometimes when going towards your intended purpose you discover something greater.

2014 marks the 80th anniversary of the discovery of Penicillin, which was by accident, so is it really a failure if the path you are currently on leads you to something better, something that may change our existence positively? Lives have been saved because of this discovery, I imagine that Sir Alexander Fleming never focused on anything but the positive outcome of his accident.

Published reports credit Fleming as saying: “One sometimes finds what one is not looking for. When I woke up just after dawn on Sept. 28, 1928, I certainly didn’t plan to revolutionize all medicine by discovering the world’s first antibiotic, or bacteria killer. But I guess that was exactly what I did.”

We have all been given the tools we need to activate our vision and your belief enhances those tools to create success. Believe you can succeed and you will.

If you never step into your light how will you ever discover the possibilities that await you?

The vision you have, the one you want to see manifest, you absolutely NEED to believe in it with everything in you, both consciously and subconsciously. Go passionately toward your path without fear carrying with you the will power to withstand all obstacles that may come up, there is no alternative!

believe in your path

 
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Posted by on April 16, 2014 in Blog

 

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Looking Ahead

09 Apr

While Staying Present!

It’s necessary to find a happy medium between these two states in order to find success within both.

Looking Ahead – Of course everyone looks ahead to the future, that’s where we place all the beautiful and dreamy things we want to accomplish. Rome wasn’t built in a day, right? Obviously, which is why we set goals within timeframes that are attainable but keep in mind that those timeframes can be flexible, just because you haven’t reached a goal at a point when you expected doesn’t mean you give up or abandon the dream, it just means the timeframe gets extended. I’ve always set my goals a little higher because I have big dreams and high expectations and at times I’ve been told I’m a dreamer but so far the dreams I really wanted to work out have manifested, maybe not always for when I planned them but usually when I’ve used every last bit of effort I have and left nothing on the table. Success from really hard work has both internal and external rewards but honestly I think internally, pride of accomplishment when in pursuit of your dreams is more rewarding than the actual success.

–        If everything in life is easily accomplished then where’s the challenge?

–        How do you know how far you can push yourself if you never extend past that comfort zone?

–        How do you know what you’re capable of or how far you can go if you’ve never stood near the edge?

Staying Present – I think this is where balance is most needed, at least for me because it’s easy to look ahead and dream but it’s difficult to know what you see in the picture ahead and not yet be there, especially if patience isn’t your strongest suit. I’ve struggled with this because I have a lot of energy for moving forward and getting things done and most of the time I get impatient with the stride, especially if it gets slowed down for any reason. Even though I know that all things happen for a reason, it’s a difficult thing for me to accept when I want to be on the fast track, when I can see what lies ahead but I can’t quite get there yet. Similar to a long distance runner, they pace themselves, they find a comfortable stride and stay in that zone to maintain it. This is a great asset although I haven’t fully developed it yet, I’ve been forced into it at times and even though I think it’s necessary to help increase aspects of my character through obstacles that help build and challenge me sometimes I overthink it and it becomes overwhelming.

Just recently I had to slow my stride and I think it’s because I wasn’t balanced between these two states, I was overanxious to move ahead and tried to push past the Universe’s timeline for all things progressing, not just my own.

Not everything in life progresses as we initially envision it, as events unfold, the picture transpires, adapts or changes. Sometimes the end result we initially saw or wanted changes into something we desire more or didn’t realize at the time because emotionally we weren’t there yet.

As I challenge myself personally so do those in my life and the Universe challenges us all through experiences that we sometimes face together. Through those experiences bonds are formed and/or strengthened by an immeasurable faith in humanity and each other.

thank-you for being there

 
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Posted by on April 9, 2014 in Blog

 

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The Ties that Bind

19 Mar

Releasing the Past!

The world of hurt caused by the feeling and expression of Anger, Grudge and/or Hurt can be overwhelming enough to stunt, damage or impede your personal growth and progression in life for the period of time it takes for you to purge it.

Most anger or grudges you hold onto come from a deep dark place of hurt, acknowledging that hurt and nurturing your feelings back into a positive state is the only way to move forward.  Obviously this is easier said than done in the lives of many, I know I’ve had my struggles with it.  When you feel wronged by another it can be difficult to let it go, most of us just want acknowledgement, to be heard, to be validated, to have our say and these are the most important parts of the process to help you move on and let it be.

Acknowledgement isn’t always easily found or accommodated:

  • The anger or grudge may be directed at someone who has now left the physical world
  • You aren’t able to find the right words to express exactly what you need to say to someone
  • The one causing the hurt is not easily reached mentally or emotionally which prevents them from fully understanding the negative effect they’ve had on you.

Not everyone realizes how much their words or actions can hurt another and some think “don’t be so sensitive” but in reality it’s that “sensitivity” that is you who you are and if they really know you then they know what will hurt you and should adjust accordingly.  I don’t mean walk around certain people like you’re on egg shells but know your audience and don’t expect everyone else to adjust to you if you don’t even try to adjust to them!

If you want others to be respectful of your feelings then be respectful of theirs, it’s as simple as it’s quoted:  “do unto others as you would have them do unto you”.  It doesn’t get more golden than that!words that hurt

If you become aware that you have hurt someone through your words or actions it is important to make amends not just for your own consciousness of behaviour but to help them process through their hurt.  I am not by any means going to say that I’m perfect, no one is!  I know I’ve been responsible for hurting someone’s feelings with my words or actions but my conscious always knows when I’m in the wrong and I try to make amends in whatever way I can through apology, understanding and validation.  The “sweep it under the table and forget it” isn’t the action to take when you realize you are wrong, it is only through acknowledgement that you can help the one you’ve hurt to let go of it and move ahead without issue.  It’s actually an important process for you as well to know you’ve made steps to correct words or actions that you know aren’t right because even though karma is a process associated with unconditional intention, if your intention isn’t to correct your wrongs then it is likely your karmic outcome will contain a few hiccups or difficulties.

Moving past hurt is basically a process you create for yourself, through whatever means, to help you channel it outward so it can then be released.  I journal my way through all the issues that cause me hurt or discontent and it is the best form of therapy for me but what works for me may not work for another, it’s just a matter of finding the process that works best for you but do try, it is important to release issues that prevent you from moving forward.

Holding onto past hurt doesn’t just control your life in the present it ruins it because it causes unhappiness and negative thoughts, negative thoughts sometimes evolve into negative actions.  Without resolution these issues will spill over into your future which can hold your life in a place of continuous cycle and recall of the moment(s) of hurt when it occurred.

It’s not as much about giving the one who has caused you hurt a break and letting it go as it is about letting it go so it doesn’t continue to hurt you so deeply.  The hurt you allow through supporting your anger or grudge will continually cycle and can cause irreparable damage to you emotionally, mentally and as a result, sometimes physically.  These three aspects of your health are co-dependent upon each other and when one is low it can alter your quality of life and honestly I don’t think that is something anyone deserves or needs to endure.

If you can, look to those in your life that you trust and admire who you can ask for assistance, advice or support whether that is through listening or helping you to make a plan.  I’ve found that when I have someone to talk to it makes a huge difference because it allows me to step outside myself so I can get a clearer perspective and vision for going forward in a better direction.

As difficult as it may be, embrace the pain, allow yourself to feel it fully so you can then start to heal, the more you heal the more you will be able to let it go and when you’ve finally rid yourself of the hurts that have paralyzed you for so long you will be able to move forward and enjoy the happiness you deserve and the future you are destined to live.

emily's quote

 
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Posted by on March 19, 2014 in Blog

 

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